Sunday, May 2, 2010

Never a Bridesmaid, Only a Bride.

This I should probably write in my personal diary, but I don't feel like it. I can post on here whatever I want.
I have never been in a "group"
I spent K-11th grade trying to be one of the popular girls. My senior year I finally realized that being popular won't make me happy. There were girls that would talk to me when I had spent 2 hours on my hair that morning and stole a cute outfit from my sister, and then the next day when I was back to looking average they would straight up ignore me in the halls.
I've never had a group of girls that I have hung out with that we endured throughout the years, er whatever. It must be my fault, cuz I don't really know anyone else like me. I've always kind of been ok with it. I've usually had a boyfriend (or now-a husband) that I've devoted most of my time to. I am absolutely horrible at keeping in touch with people. I hate talking on the phone most of the time. I mean I do it, but I'd rather not, like, just shoot the breeze.
Thats probably a huge part huh...girlfriends like to gab all the time. I don't get all the drama either. Another big thing is flakiness. I can't stand it when you make plans and then day of comes and they are no where to be seen. Just be sraight up and say you've got somethin goin on!

I'm not complaining, I guess I'm just admitting to myself that: I'm different. I'm unique. I absolutely LOVE spending all of my time with my man, and little man. They are all I need. I would rather do that than anything else in the whole world. I hear women say things about their friends like "I don't know what I would do without my amazing friends!!" and I have gone my whole life without them.

Lately, my problem has been that I think I am way better friends with girls than I actually am. I find this out the hard way.
Ok now I am complaining. I have had very few friends in my whole life that are STRAIGHT UP with me. I'm a very understanding person; as long as you're straight up with me.

16 comments:

Ashleigh said...

At the end of the day, family is all that matters. I have been feeling really alone lately and I think it's because Iasi and I mostly spend ALL our time together and now that he's gone, I don't really have many people to turn to. Who cares about girlfriends - family first! Don't worry about the "group" thing. Friends come & go. xo

Madalyn said...

At the end of the day I come home to my soft place to land and that's my family, my little tiny family that I'm just starting. I love them with all that I have and am! Friends come and go but family is (hopefully) there for life! I have about 2 friends that I've had for years now and that I still hang out with, but when I've had a rough day and need some venting, I call my sisters or ask my husband for some comfort. I invest all my time to the only peole who will invest it back.
P.s. I always thought you were a popular girl in school :) You were different and unique and I think that's why you got a long with so many people, at least that's the view I saw.

Shanae said...

You sound like me. I don't do drama and I hate flakiness as well!!! I've never really had a super tight group of girlfriends that stay in contact over the years either...but it's not all bad. Like you said, girls like us are different and we're each unique. :)

Chantalle Bishop said...

I see NO mention of California girls! What the heck?? We love you :)
It is nice to get married and have in laws for friends! I got 4 sisters in law which has been fun.

Jeana said...

i don't do drama either, i was lucky in that way with my girl frineds from high school. but the sad truth is that even though we have been friends for forever. ask us how much we see each other? i can count on 1 hand how much we see each other in a year. you get married and have kids and kind of go different directions. so really it is your family that is most important, and you married your best friend :) i know a lot of people have a close group of girls that they hang out with regularly but its ok to not need that. and seriously carly.. everyone that i know loves you! and you have jana, sisters are way better than girl friends!

Clayton, Kelsie & Carter said...

Carl, YOu are so at my level. I was a wild child in high school...It was fun. I had like 4 or 5 close friends and we hung out on a regular basis. But then I married Clayton, which has been great. The wildness faded away and I became a momma. Truthfully, I love my friends from high school. I would love to see them if I had the chance, but if something is going on with my little family, that HAS to come first. That is what makes me the most happy....and I know it is where I have chosen to be. You are THE BEST momma and wifey. And that is what this life is all about. (In my opinion anyway.) Having friends is nice, but like Ms. Fackrell said, I can count how many times I have seen them on ONE hand. And you have your sissy. That is also a HUGE luxury, I would know because I have 3 of them. :) XOXO

Ang and Shawn said...

ummm i am totally the same way...except i do not have a sister. Which sux so bad. i never ever hang out with anyone from high school. i loved the girls i played soccer with...but i guess not enough to keep in touch (: one thing that does drive me nuts though is whenever we do couples dates or when friends come over it's always my husband's good friends and their gf/spouses. I love them to death...i just wish sometimes i contributed to the friend group! i have friends... but not a really really good group of friends that are on the same level as me. i guess we are just mature and would rather not deal with the drama/flakiness/hassle/commitment that goes along with it all ;)

Bradley, DeAnna, and Donovan said...

I have always felt that way. I had one best friend for 3 years and it ended so stupidly/painfully that I never made the effort to be that close to another girl ever again. I think I have one close friend that I can talk to once a year and we just pick up where we left off, no drama involved. Girls really are too much effort! I'm so happy where I am now, I have an amazing/fun/handsome husband and an adorable/hilarious/sweet little boy that I am completely in love with! I've also found growing up that the older my sister and I get, the closer we get. She's probably my favorite girl to hang out with and I don't think that's a bad thing.

Katie Jo said...

hehe it's best to spend time with family. I have a few close girlfriends... but they're the close kind of friends where... if you don't talk for a few months, when you do talk... it picks up right back where you left off. You are one of those friends. I liked you right from the second I saw you at Orientation hehe... you're my kind of friend... not drama. I sure just love you Carly!!

Rachel said...

I am pretty sure you were the popular girl in high school. I don't know if anyone did not like you. You were that awesome. Well I mean you were awesome on the days you got ready ;)

Melinda B. said...

I think women do need women so even though you may think you don't need them, you are probably getting that need fulfilled through your mom, sister, etc etc. And it sure looks like you have a slew of supportive women by the long list of comments you always get on your blog posts. Don't give up on the softer sex. We have alot to offer.

Keyra Ako said...

I actually consider us friends even tho were cousins! I mean even tho we are not as close as we were when you came down to hawaii back in the day! I still remember how your dad slammed my finger in the car door...LOL!! But I cant say the same about not having friends... I mean I never had sisters so my best friends that I still keep in touch with to this day, I consider them family!! But you are right... family is all you need!! thanks again for supporting me durring my baptism!! Love you guyz!! Give Kaius a BIG huge and Kiss for me!!!

Sarah said...

Wow Carly, we are so much alike. To sum it up, I know exactly how you feel. I am just fine with my hubby and boy too, but I feel ya.

Crazy world said...

i have always felt the same. I made bad choices in High School that i regret now and wish i did better, made something of my self. i didnt come back to lehi high for my senior year. i was depressed, i was on drugs and alchol, most of all i was embarrassed and ashamed i hurt my true friends from all my choices i have made. but in the end i wouldnt be here if i didnt. i love my life now its filled with hope, laughter, joy, happiness, love. i miss my true friends but in the end my family makes me complete.

Alicia said...

Hey ya girly! I know how you feel! I can count on less than one hand really really good friends and do I live near them?? Nope. We all live apart and I literally spend all day with Steve. It's him and I and we do pretty good that way. Sure it would be so nice to hang out with a ton of good friends, but I don't think that I am destined for that either. Us girls like that are just fine hanging out at home with our hubbys and kids. I think you are a great friend!! (see you live far away too) you are an awesome mom too!!! Carly you ROCK!!!

Jana said...

DUDE! Sorry, I've been lame lately... I need to be a better sister/daughter. When I get stressed I kind of retreat into myself for a while, but I want you to know that I think about you all the time and even though I have the same problem with picking up the phone... I would love to hear about your friend drama anytime.

That's why you guys need to move to California and be our next door neighbors... then we would never need to use the phone. :)