Thursday, October 13, 2011

Long Update.

So 30 days of blogging. It didn't improve my lameness so I decided it dies.

Kaius has been my toy-fetching, diaper fetching, chap stick-eating little man. Still cute as ever. Monroe is almost sitting up, and loves interesting toys. And gets bored easily. She is my little ray of sunshine. And they are NEVER asleep at the same time. Sometimes not even at night.

So, about a month ago I walk into relief society, and I catch someone's eye from across the room...its Melissa, one of my best friends from High School (in Cali)!!!!



I immediately go sit next to her and we embrace (lol, yup, in the middle of the lesson.) We haven't seen each other in over 3 years so we were beside ourselves. It was so hard to keep quiet til the end of the lesson so we could ask each other some questions! She and her fiance were thinking of moving into the ward so they decided to show up! We had them over for dinner right after and caught up. Such a wonderful surprise.

then.
The NEXT week, who do I see new at church? ANOTHER friend/aquaintance from high school (in Cali), Laura Faith (cept she just got married so thats changed).



I stole these from their Facebooks. Cuties.
TWO people that I went to high school in California, not even UT, show up at my ward? it was craziness. So ecstatic about it.


OK, so...I need to blog about my 2 ER experiences.

Last Friday I ask my facebook friends for ear ache remedies. onion oil, garlic oil, breastmilk, vinegar, hydrogen peroxide, alcohol, heat pad, olive oil etc etc...
I tried most of them but it just seemed to get worse. Swimmer's ear is what I had, so putting more weird fluids probably exacerbated the condition. The pain kept me up ALL night. I sat on the couch watching TV and popped IBuprofen...but then at 4 AM the pain would not go away no matter how much I took (I took a max of 800 mg...which is plenty) and I was bawling it hurt so bad. I went to wake josh so I could have him support. Uhm, when Josh is woken out of a dead sleep...he is kind of....not Josh. So for the first 20 minutes he was flipping out.

"HOW MANY PAIN MEDS DID YOU TAKE?!?!?"

"YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE TO BED EARLIER!!!"

yeah.....

Anyway, Josh wanted to call our home teacher, at 5 AM, and have him come be at our house so our kids are home alone. I'm like, NO, I'll just go by myself. So I decided since I'm going to the downtown ER at SL regional, I might as well advertise my zumba classes. So I wore Zumba cargo pants, hot pink chucks, and my Zumba hoodie.

Clue #1...I am a basket case.



At the ER, I demand morphine (thats what they gave me at the ER in california when my sister took me for the flu, best day ever) and they said NO, because I drove myself. (remember that key point)

So the doc asks me if I would like an IV of the start of my antibiotics or would i like to just go home with pills. I told him my main goal in life at that point was to get some SLEEP. So he said, well just take the pills, if your ear gets worse just come back and we wont charge you for a 2nd visit (lie #1). Then he says he is going to bend the rules and let me take my perkocets at home since I drove myself. Then a nurse walks in with pills and says "Here is some water and pills, please take them now" so, I oblige. But before I swallow the perkocets I say "I havent eaten in like 10 hours...DO I NEED TO TAKE THESE WITH FOOD?"
Nurse: "Nah. Food isn't required. Don't worry about it." (lie #2)
I'm like, alright. gulp.

I sit in the car and call around to pharmacies to see if anyone is open. Hmm, I'm really hungry, I think I'll go to McDonalds.
On the way to McDonalds....I am TRIPPIN OUT. I am paranoid and thinking every car is trying to kill me, but my reaction time is very slow. (Clue #2 I am a basket case)

There is a line at Mcdonalds, by the time I hear "Welcome to McDonalds, may I take your order?" I am STRAIGHT UP: HIGH.



High, by definition: excited or stupefied by or as if by a drug.
I'm like "Uh...er yooo serrving breeckkfessst?" (its 7 AM by this point)
The Mcdonalds worker was like, Um. Yes. (They could totally tell I was high as a kite)
Then they took FOREVER (or it seemed to be) to get me my food. I pulled off to the side, to leave space for other McDonalds consumers to pass. I call Josh.

"Hi. I'M IMPAIRED. I DON'T WANT TO WRECK OUR NEW CAR."
"Uh, please pull over"
"I YAM PULLED OVER. I'M IN THE MgDONALDS DRIVE THRU. I CAN'T DRIVE HOME. I CAN'T. I DONT WANT TO WRECK OUR NEW CAR, YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TO DRIVE WHILE IMPAIRED."
"ok, just wait there."
I tried eating some food, but I was so sick to my stomach I couldn't eat more than one bite. My ear pain is temporarily gone so my body shuts down. I'm am awakened by my phone and Josh said a member of the bishopric is coming to get me, and a bunch of other crap but I was like...GOTTA GO, and I opened up the car door and tossed my cookies. Fell asleep again.

I am jolted awake by a member of said bishopric by a tap on my window. He took me to a few pharmacies to find an open one, I don't remember the conversations we had, but I'm pretty sure everyone witnessing me throwing up (dry heeving) on the street at each pharmacy thought I partied pretty hard that night.




He took me home and I crashed for about 6 hours straight (at which point Josh((not knowing of any of my throwing up)) updated my FB status that all was well and I was going to sleep for 3 days). Josh waking me to give me antibiotics whenever he was supposed to. When I woke up finally for longer than 3 seconds to drink down a pill, I threw all the water and medicine up. Long story short, I couldn't eat or drink anything so I ended back up in the ER to get an anti-nausea (I only went BACK to the ER because the dumb doc said I wouldnt be charged)




Don't get me started on errors on medical bills. But, the record still stands, I've never had a medical bill since I've been married be a correct bill.

I was basically a useless pile of nothing the next few days. Josh cleaned the WHOLE house and I didn't even notice. Various members of the ward took Kaius while Josh went to work and I'm sure he just had a blast. They brought us the sacrament at home. I received a priesthood blessing (THAT, I do remember. It felt so cool to feel the spirit so strong during the prayer) At church yesterday I was so surprised at how many people had heard about my sickness and wanted to know if I was OK...I've never felt so loved! People care about me! :) Such an awesome support system. We would have been in serious trouble without everyone's help.

4 comments:

Jana said...

Whoa... Glad you are ok, sounds intense.

Ps Moseley has eaten about 5 lbs of chapstick in his life also.

Mom said...

That was quite an experience, Carls. I wish we lived closer so I could have been more help. :(

(5 lbs of chapstick made me laugh, Jana.)

Rachel said...

That sucks. But it did make for an entertaining blog post.

Ash said...

lol you always have crazy stories! I'm glad you're ok!!!! love you