Josh and Carly

Epiphany

2012-01-22T13:03:00.000-08:00

My friend Sarah posted this article on Facebook: http://www.ncregister.com/blog/to-the-mother-with-only-one-child

Basically it says whether you have one or many children, being a mom is hard work. and Its HARD adjusting to being a mom.

I see and hear about those women in relief society that NEVER complain or say anything negative. You know what? They are all grown and their children are grown. They don't have babies waking them up all night anymore, and they have better perspective on life. Right now I feel like crap for complaining being a mom is hard, but you know what?? Its REALLY freakin hard, and life without sleep makes everything a chore. Even eating ice cream...that creates dirty dishes. I know my kids will grow and I will miss them as babies...but freakin A will I love sleeping through the night.

Kaius was worried...

2012-01-17T14:17:00.000-08:00

This morning Josh was leaving for work so he gave me and Monroe a kiss (and woke her up doing so, my favorite) But right after she got her kiss, Kaius woke up and walked out of his room. He came in bed with Roe and I and Josh gave him a kiss and interacted with them a few seconds. He said bye and walked out of the room. Kaius' lip quivered. He pointed at me and cried, "Mooommmmmmmmmmmyyyy!"
He walked in after I got my goodbye kiss, so he thought his Daddy intentionally forgot to give his Mommy a kiss. And he just lost it.

When I leave at night to go teach Zumba, Kaius directs my kisses. He's always first, then directs me to kiss Daddy, or Monroe ("Roe Roe"). So..I'm pretty sure he thought we were getting a divorce. I took Kaius out and let him know I already got a goodbye kiss, but I'll gladly do it again to show him everything is ok. It was cute. He stopped crying but man, he was upSET!

I just wanted to remember that. :)

7 Tier Diaper Cake

2012-01-15T19:35:00.000-08:00

I couldn't wait to make this cake...I've been planning it for, like, 6 months. But I didn't want to make it ALL out of diapers. It would have been really freakin' expensive. I came up with the idea all on my own...I didn't even look at pinterest!

Josh helped a ton on the construction. When I told him I was taking pictures he was like "NO, I don't want pictures of me doing something like this!" But by the end, he was getting after me for not taking a picture of EVERY step. Go figure.

And to be honest...he was more of a perfectionist on how it looked than I did. It turned out great!

I needed something to fill the inside, that was much cheaper than diapers....

Hmm....

hmm...

OH!

I got a very interesting reaction from the cashier. Another shopper stopped to ask me how many kids I have.

The top tier was the only one made of diapers only.

[in the picture I told Josh to give a look that said "The things I do for you, Cammie" I can't tell if his eyes are open. It was like pulling alligators teeth to get him to turn some sports/NFL/Broncos show off and help me.]

I went to go buy some rope, but a few years ago I got really big into knitting and made like 3 projects I never finished. So, durr. Yarn!

Once the tiers got bigger, we tied sections together to make bigger sections...so it didn't come apart in the drive to the partay.

We wrapped our legs around it to keep the diapers in place.

I went to buy some ribbon to tie around the outside, but happened to pass some really cute Duck Tape (Duck is the BRAND...yes I know its "duct" tape) And it was a LOT cheaper than ribbon.

But I got ribbon for bows still. And I knew the toilet paper would be showing, so I got some tulle to cover it up.

The final product:

I couldn't wait to Pin It

I had such a fun time at Cammie's shower. She was so cute and all her students loved having the bash when they have to have a Cammie-break for a while when she has her babe. Hope everyone else had a great time too!

Slacker

2012-01-10T00:03:00.000-08:00

I am a slacker with everything right now.

Christmas was awesome. We went to California to spend it with my Dad (& fam) and Josh's parents and all his siblings. We were crazy busy, I literally remember no down time. Always on the go, seeing someone. It was really fun and nice to see everyone, it was also exhausting.

Kaius is pretty much over Pixar movies. All he wants to watch is Spiderman or Superman (Piderman & Pooperman). He doesn't care if it is cartoon or not. Josh showed him some episodes of old school Superman at my Dad's on Netflix...he was hooked. Now every time I am carrying him to time out he holds out his arms straight up and puts his hands in fists and goes "POOPERMAAAAN!".

He also doesn't understand that Superman and Spiderman are beating up villains, not random citizens (like, oh, their mother, father, or baby sister) He uses us for punching bags frequently. (Aren't parents supposed to kind of filter what their kids see on TV? Apparently anything goes in our household)
Josh taught Kaius how to move the temperature up on the thermostat. Way to go.
Kaius is starting to form small sentences "Daddy, its Mommy!" when I get home from Zumba. or "What happened?" if we react to something. He gets especially cranky when his lil sis gets into his tool box, "No no no, Roe Roe."

Monroe...I wish I could freeze her in this stage forever and ever. She just has those cute little 2 bottom teeth. She isn't very mobile..well, she can crawl backwards only. It frustrates her. She is ALWAYS moving her feet in circles (like propellers) and lots of times her hands are doing the same, mostly when she is whining for food. She learned to wave. I can ALWAYS ALWAYS count on her to give me a huge smile and make me happy. I love her random hugs. She'll just curl into me and melt, for a few seconds.

The Hunger Games...

2011-11-26T20:32:00.000-08:00

I just read The Hunger Games, took me about a day.

And I did not love it.

It made me super hungry. It was much too violent. I would never want to watch a movie that violent. Blood, pus, skulls smashing, necks snapping...that isn't entertainment to me. If the movie is PG-13 I'll go, but I have a hard time imagining they can deliver anything close to the book without being rated R.
[however I just looked it up, and it says it'll be rated pg-13]

It made me more grateful for what I had, though.

Say what you want about Stephenie Meyer's writing...but the "hook" she had at the end of each book left me driving all over town finding the next one. At the end of this one I was like, that's it? I don't think I'll read the next two. I think I even heard some were disappointed with MockingJay.

Anyway. That's that. Twilight is better. The Host is still my favorite book. Shows you how much I've read in the last few years.

What did you think of The Hunger Games?

What Zumba is to Me.

2011-10-28T11:46:00.000-07:00

I remember a few years ago, my sister Jana was telling me "You have to go try a Zumba class. You'd love it. Its working out but its, like, FUN." I had never heard of it but I just assumed it was just like going salsa dancing. Which isn't my cup of tea. I went on a date once salsa dancing and I guess in that culture you are supposed to have intense eye contact, which immediately creeped me out.

I never liked chocolate/sweets that much, until I gave birth to Kaius! I guess! I turned into a baking machine. I blame Pioneer Woman, but also would kiss her feet if I met her.

A few friends of mine started a facebook group called "Facebook Biggest Loser". The person to lose the most weight won all the $, it was $20 per person. Well, there were a lot of people who wanted to just do it for free and not for the monetary reward, myself included. I didn't want to temporarily diet with the incentive of money, I wanted to make a lifestyle change (but really, I'm a big cheapwad). ((However, I guess due to not enough people paying, they cancelled the whole thing...Oh well! I was making a change by myself.))
So, I got a gym membership, I started going in the mornings before everyone was up.
It made me feel good that I was doing something...but I would run 2 minutes and have to walk the rest of the half hour. I had never been in that bad of shape!

They had a new Zumba class starting. I showed up, there were lots of ladies there. I just kinda inched my way into the back area. I just looked around at the girls there and said "Am I ok here? I've never done this before." and there was little miss Lisa,who had never done it before either, she was nice. Then, Cammie graced the stage. I remember all throughout the class, Lisa and I kept saying to each other "This is so fun!". I definitely didn't have the stamina to make it through a class, I remember just stopping and standing a few times to catch my breath. At the end we were saying how we couldn't wait for the next one. I casually mentioned to Lisa that I'd love to be up there someday. The next class she asked me if I was going to become and instructor. I was like psh...maybe in a few years?

I enjoyed Cammie's classes because I could TELL she was having the TIME OF HER LIFE. I looked up her Zumba profile and added her on Facebook. I thought she looked like a nice, fun person. Since I just moved to a new area, I thought "what if she and I became friends?"

I would email her messages every once in a while and tell her how awesome she was. She kept things very business and polite. A few months later, she invited me to a "Zumbathon"

and I said, "you say its Zumba and I come running!" so we carpooled together with some friends, and invited them all over for dinner. I served the best sandwich ever,

and I'm pretty sure that's why they all liked me after that :)

I find myself thinking a lot that I think Zumba was made specifically for me. If you know me, you know I LOVE color. Zumba clothes are the most colorful clothes with the coolest, funkiest color combinations. I love that I get the chance to miss my kids. I love the friends that I meet at classes. I love that I'm passionate about Zumba and I am actually having people come to my classes!

If you'd like to come I would love to have you!

1164 South Main Street

Mondays - 8:30 PM
Thursdays - 8 PM
Saturdays - 10 AM

$5 a class or $40 for a 10 class punch pass.

My Instructor training with Gina Grant was awesome. Ok, some of it was awesome. Most of it was going over the steps, how to do Cumbia, Merengue, etc. I used to sit and wait for Cammie at the end of each class, and I've heard many people ask her to break down moves for them. And what shoes are best, etc etc...
So as soon as I heard what each move was formally called what, the rest was pretty much boring. She had to keep going over the moves and I definitely wasn't back in tip top shape yet. I was so so SO mentally and physically drained when there was about an hour left of the training. Me and this other guy Josh were like...basket cases. He said his brains felt like mashed potatoes.

And he said somethin...about pouring gravy on his head. I dont remember exactly. I had been trying to be really awesome when I knew Gina was looking at me, but towards the end she pointed at me and made the yawning motion with her hand.
Well, sh*%.
I nodded back to her. I stopped pretending after that.
But I wasn't too tired for a photo with her!

Then on the way home Jana started feeling like me. We got in her car after our carpool dropped us off and she couldn't even turn the key properly, and didn't know what direction she was driving, haha. We got back to her house and made her husband make us food :).

Long Update.

2011-10-13T20:05:00.000-07:00

So 30 days of blogging. It didn't improve my lameness so I decided it dies.

Kaius has been my toy-fetching, diaper fetching, chap stick-eating little man. Still cute as ever. Monroe is almost sitting up, and loves interesting toys. And gets bored easily. She is my little ray of sunshine. And they are NEVER asleep at the same time. Sometimes not even at night.

So, about a month ago I walk into relief society, and I catch someone's eye from across the room...its Melissa, one of my best friends from High School (in Cali)!!!!

I immediately go sit next to her and we embrace (lol, yup, in the middle of the lesson.) We haven't seen each other in over 3 years so we were beside ourselves. It was so hard to keep quiet til the end of the lesson so we could ask each other some questions! She and her fiance were thinking of moving into the ward so they decided to show up! We had them over for dinner right after and caught up. Such a wonderful surprise.

then.
The NEXT week, who do I see new at church? ANOTHER friend/aquaintance from high school (in Cali), Laura Faith (cept she just got married so thats changed).

I stole these from their Facebooks. Cuties.
TWO people that I went to high school in California, not even UT, show up at my ward? it was craziness. So ecstatic about it.

OK, so...I need to blog about my 2 ER experiences.

Last Friday I ask my facebook friends for ear ache remedies. onion oil, garlic oil, breastmilk, vinegar, hydrogen peroxide, alcohol, heat pad, olive oil etc etc...
I tried most of them but it just seemed to get worse. Swimmer's ear is what I had, so putting more weird fluids probably exacerbated the condition. The pain kept me up ALL night. I sat on the couch watching TV and popped IBuprofen...but then at 4 AM the pain would not go away no matter how much I took (I took a max of 800 mg...which is plenty) and I was bawling it hurt so bad. I went to wake josh so I could have him support. Uhm, when Josh is woken out of a dead sleep...he is kind of....not Josh. So for the first 20 minutes he was flipping out.

"HOW MANY PAIN MEDS DID YOU TAKE?!?!?"

"YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE TO BED EARLIER!!!"

yeah.....

Anyway, Josh wanted to call our home teacher, at 5 AM, and have him come be at our house so our kids are home alone. I'm like, NO, I'll just go by myself. So I decided since I'm going to the downtown ER at SL regional, I might as well advertise my zumba classes. So I wore Zumba cargo pants, hot pink chucks, and my Zumba hoodie.

Clue #1...I am a basket case.

At the ER, I demand morphine (thats what they gave me at the ER in california when my sister took me for the flu, best day ever) and they said NO, because I drove myself. (remember that key point)

So the doc asks me if I would like an IV of the start of my antibiotics or would i like to just go home with pills. I told him my main goal in life at that point was to get some SLEEP. So he said, well just take the pills, if your ear gets worse just come back and we wont charge you for a 2nd visit (lie #1). Then he says he is going to bend the rules and let me take my perkocets at home since I drove myself. Then a nurse walks in with pills and says "Here is some water and pills, please take them now" so, I oblige. But before I swallow the perkocets I say "I havent eaten in like 10 hours...DO I NEED TO TAKE THESE WITH FOOD?"
Nurse: "Nah. Food isn't required. Don't worry about it." (lie #2)
I'm like, alright. gulp.

I sit in the car and call around to pharmacies to see if anyone is open. Hmm, I'm really hungry, I think I'll go to McDonalds.
On the way to McDonalds....I am TRIPPIN OUT. I am paranoid and thinking every car is trying to kill me, but my reaction time is very slow. (Clue #2 I am a basket case)

There is a line at Mcdonalds, by the time I hear "Welcome to McDonalds, may I take your order?" I am STRAIGHT UP: HIGH.

High, by definition: excited or stupefied by or as if by a drug.
I'm like "Uh...er yooo serrving breeckkfessst?" (its 7 AM by this point)
The Mcdonalds worker was like, Um. Yes. (They could totally tell I was high as a kite)
Then they took FOREVER (or it seemed to be) to get me my food. I pulled off to the side, to leave space for other McDonalds consumers to pass. I call Josh.

"Hi. I'M IMPAIRED. I DON'T WANT TO WRECK OUR NEW CAR."
"Uh, please pull over"
"I YAM PULLED OVER. I'M IN THE MgDONALDS DRIVE THRU. I CAN'T DRIVE HOME. I CAN'T. I DONT WANT TO WRECK OUR NEW CAR, YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TO DRIVE WHILE IMPAIRED."
"ok, just wait there."
I tried eating some food, but I was so sick to my stomach I couldn't eat more than one bite. My ear pain is temporarily gone so my body shuts down. I'm am awakened by my phone and Josh said a member of the bishopric is coming to get me, and a bunch of other crap but I was like...GOTTA GO, and I opened up the car door and tossed my cookies. Fell asleep again.

I am jolted awake by a member of said bishopric by a tap on my window. He took me to a few pharmacies to find an open one, I don't remember the conversations we had, but I'm pretty sure everyone witnessing me throwing up (dry heeving) on the street at each pharmacy thought I partied pretty hard that night.

He took me home and I crashed for about 6 hours straight (at which point Josh((not knowing of any of my throwing up)) updated my FB status that all was well and I was going to sleep for 3 days). Josh waking me to give me antibiotics whenever he was supposed to. When I woke up finally for longer than 3 seconds to drink down a pill, I threw all the water and medicine up. Long story short, I couldn't eat or drink anything so I ended back up in the ER to get an anti-nausea (I only went BACK to the ER because the dumb doc said I wouldnt be charged)

Don't get me started on errors on medical bills. But, the record still stands, I've never had a medical bill since I've been married be a correct bill.

I was basically a useless pile of nothing the next few days. Josh cleaned the WHOLE house and I didn't even notice. Various members of the ward took Kaius while Josh went to work and I'm sure he just had a blast. They brought us the sacrament at home. I received a priesthood blessing (THAT, I do remember. It felt so cool to feel the spirit so strong during the prayer) At church yesterday I was so surprised at how many people had heard about my sickness and wanted to know if I was OK...I've never felt so loved! People care about me! :) Such an awesome support system. We would have been in serious trouble without everyone's help.

Day 12 - A Band/Artist that has Gotten You Through Some Tough Days:

2011-09-13T22:27:00.000-07:00

Yeah, ever since I got pregnant with Kaius...I have not wanted to listen to much music. I just have such an appreciation for silence. Music is just noise. And I get more than my fill at Zumba.

Day 11 - Something You Don't Seem to Get Compliments On:

2011-09-07T21:27:00.001-07:00

My skin. Josh told me our kids probably wont have nice skin, and he doesn't have nice skin. And we are both attracted to people with nice skin (attracted like, "oh look at that girls' nice porcelain skin, honey!")

Day 10 - Something People Seem to Compliment You the Most On:

2011-09-04T23:27:00.000-07:00

In high school, my hair. Now...probably my shoes. I like shoes. Bright colored shoes, animal prints, high heels, funky chucks, ballet flats, Coach, patent leather....I love them all :)

Day 9 - Something That Makes You Mad:

2011-09-02T18:27:00.000-07:00

Two things right off the top of my head:

No matter what, no matter how much time in advance I give, My family is not. at. the. dinner. table ready with drinks and the table set ready to eat. Its like they like to eat dinner cold?? I work hard for good dinner and so I get a little mad sometimes. A few times its been just too good to eat cold or semi-cold and so I'll just say my own little prayer and start eating!! But then that makes the family (AKA Josh) a little mad. ;)

And when I'm cleaning a room...picking up toys or clothes and putting them away...then looking behind me and seeing Kaius pulls each toy and piece of clothing out that I JUST PUT AWAY, and throw it around the room.

Day 8 - Someone Who has Treated You Bad

2011-08-29T13:00:00.000-07:00

Out of 7 of my working years, my boss at Zions was the only HUGE BIOTCH! HAhaha..I seriously have loved every job I've had. Loved all my bosses. Cept her. But she would yell at everyone and threaten jobs, leave the office for 4 hours straight to go christmas shopping, I blogged about her yankee swap gift exchange crap, she would talk crap to me about other people...to other people about me. Pull me in her office and chat for an hour about pregnancy and then get ticked when production was down...yeah... so I decided to peace out and start a family.

Day 7 - Someone Who has made your Life worth Living

2011-08-25T23:29:00.000-07:00

Josh was the total knight in shining armor when I met him. I was dating a loser and Josh told me to stop seeing him completely if I was going to start hanging out with him, at all. I was pretty shocked when he said that, and to tell you the truth...I didn't even like Josh that much. I'd been praying for a way out and this was my chance. I remember that we were on the phone when he gave me the ultimatum. He was shopping at Smiths, and I was at work. He said he would remove himself right now before he got emotionally attached, and said to call him back when I made my decision. I had made the decision already on the phone with him, but I waited like 10 minutes to make it seem like I thought about it :P. I wanted Josh as a friend for sure, so that's how it started.

Day 6 - Something you Hope you Never have to Do

2011-08-24T21:19:00.000-07:00

I hope I never have to go to my own child's funeral. Biggest overwhelming fear.

Day 5 - Something you Hope to do

2011-08-23T23:34:00.001-07:00

*Yeah, I fell off the wagon. I didn't say it would be 30 consecutive days. But seeing my girl Sarah posting her 30 day challenge reminds me to continue mine. Although mine has been...still lame.

I hope to travel to Europe with Josh someday. I hope to always be able to live within my means. I hope I teach Kai & Roe important things, about church, money, credit, and priorities. I hope I always strive to keep my marriage strong and fresh. I hope we are something cool as a family for halloween.

day 4 - Something You Need to Forgive Someone For

2011-08-17T22:40:00.000-07:00

I need to forgive Taylor. Sometimes I still think about what a stupid moron he is. And how he didn't think or care about how anyone else would be affected. I always hope that Josh was able to separate the 2 events in his mind, so that when he thinks back to Kaius' birth, he doesn't think of Taylor's death. Plus, we stayed awake until 2 or 3 AM talking/Josh grieving the night before I was induced (I didn't need to grieve yet, I was just pissed). Josh had to leave me in the hospital with brand new Kaius to go to the funeral. I was supportive of Josh going, but pissed that this death was no accident. It was controlled.

But you know what, I need to forgive him. I shouldn't judge him. I do not know exactly what he was going through. I have no idea what it feels like for my spouse to tell me I suck and leave me, and then find out they're pregnant (that would be extra crazy in my case).

Day 3 - Something you need to Forgive Yourself for

2011-08-16T23:58:00.000-07:00

I don't think I have anything here for Day 3, but Amanda said something about yesterdays, how it wasn't about ME.

Right now is a time in my life where I feel like I'm not passionate about anything. I change diapers, make dinners, and do laundry. I don't create things. I am not in the best shape, so I don't dance super well, yet. I like lots about me but I can't think of something I LOVE. I love my hair, I guess. I don't think every girl wants the kind of hair they don't have ;).

Update on our car break-in:
Josh saw one of the kids that ran away had something in his arms. Tonight Josh was out playing with Kaius and they spotted a black backpack (couldn't be seen at night)on the side of the road with some car jacking tools inside. The kid I'm sure thought he was being followed and just threw it. Which means all day they didn't come back here to see if it was still there. Which means Josh scared the living crap out of them.

Day 2 - Something you Love about Yourself

2011-08-15T13:59:00.000-07:00

I love my choice of husband.

He is also the type of person to have confidence sky-high, but he seems to always surprise me when he stops and tries to do something to make my life better or try to change to be a better husband. He searched a long time for a wife and I think that made him an even more awesome husband. When I first met him, I thought he was a total Me Monster. Well, he still kind of is sometimes (and he can admit it) but I know his intentions. For example, when we were first dating, he came over to my house and my roommate and I were trying to hang a picture in our kitchen. She and I started hammering the nail in and he snatched the hammer out of my hands and said "Oh I'll do it" and he just took over. Me and my roommate looked at each other like he was nuts. But now that I know him, looking back, all he was trying to do was be a gentleman.
OK, cheesefest over.

30 Days of Truth

2011-08-13T23:47:00.000-07:00

I've never done a "challenge" style blog-a-thon thing-a-ma-jig before.. But my blog is lame-o lately.

Day #1
Something you hate about yourself:

Hmmm...well I don't really hate anything about myself. I always say "I'm awesome" and yada yada but honestly, I don't think I'm better than anyone else ('cept, like, hitler, really) but I love myself for choices I've made. I haven't always loved myself. Howeva, If I could change something about me, I would change how I'm kindova prude in the bedroom. [Wow, TMI?] But really, looking at the Kama Sutra shouldn't make me blush. I've been married three and a frickin' half YEARS!!

People Make Me Crazy!!!!

2011-08-05T15:02:00.000-07:00

Either you can buy your kids' shoes BRAND NEW at Zappos with free shipping (& free return shipping...)

Or

Buy them "pre-owned" on eBay with crusty insides for $27.50 and No Returns accepted. This is the seller's decription: " THESE SHOES ARE IN GOOD USED PLAY CONDITION. THEY HAVE NO STAINS, RIPS, HOLES OR TEARS. THEY HAVE BEEN WASHED AND CLEANED. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS PLEASE EMAIL ME."
Honestly, you can get these for $25 at any mall. Guess the "Auction Style" really makes people feel like they've won.

Kaius is being so Cute today!

2011-08-03T16:18:00.000-07:00

or "tyoot" as he pronounces it. I gotta do an update post about the K-Man.

This little boy would LIVE outside if we let him. Every time he has to come inside or get inside the car, I'm pretty sure a little piece of him dies. At least he acts like it.
He is obsessed with any kind of bike, car, or truck. Of course he is still obsessed with balls. Balls are his #1 priority.
He will look at any oblong shape and say "football". Its the cutest thing ever.
Today Monroe and Kaius were looking and each other and smiling. I said to Roe, "He likes you! Do you like her, Kaius?" and he said "I wite you" and hugged her. Which was probably his first sentence ever, but so cute.
Then I said "Do you love her?" and he said "I wuv you". I died from the cuteness.
He pronounces Monroe: Roe Roe.
bopple=apple
bopper=diaper
gucky= a form of gross, Josh says "ucky" but Kaius made up gucky
coors=cars
mamaw=grandma
pampa=grandpa
He makes a "t" sound instead of a "ck" sound..just like my little brother Matthew. I was "his Tarly" for years...but now he is a grown up 4th grader and is too cool ;).
Kaius is a man's man. If he has a choice between a man and a woman (like if I leave him with grandparents, or we have friends over) he will almost always go to the man. He loves babies.
Candy is currency.
Anything with a wrapper, he thinks its candy. Like...tampons, condoms...he is very disappointed when he finds out its not (by me telling him, not by him getting them open, ps.).
Almost every time we go to the park we are told by someone that Kaius is very coordinated for his age. He jumps with both feet and lands with both feet. He can throw balls pretty far, and sometimes he can catch. He even likes watching football. I'm so burnt out on football, I hope Monroe will be interested in shopping with me instead of watching football!

Well, that's about all I can think of. The end.

Phrases I don't like

2011-08-02T22:49:00.000-07:00

"Everything happens for a reason"
What does that even mean? I have always wondered. Why do people believe this?

Well, literally, yes everything happens for a reason. The reason someone gets hit by a train, is because...they were in front of a train.
But people tend to use this phrase in situations like...they didn't get a house they put an offer on, people often give this "advice" to couples struggling with infertility (LAST thing they want to hear, PS) (edited to say, I can't speak for ALL people struggling with infertility..just the ones who have told me this), not getting a job you interviewed for, etc.

No, you didn't get that job you interviewed for because they felt someone else was better for it. If you sleep through your alarm on your way to work doesn't mean if you woke up on time you would have gotten in a car wreck.

Are you pickin' up what I'm puttin' down?

Take 9/11 terrorist attack for example. All those stories of people that were sick that day, slept through their alarm, etc and weren't at the World Trade Center that day and therefore didn't die....They weren't supposed to die, but everyone else who was responsible and showed up WERE supposed to? Puh-lease.

I believe God gives us blessings. Many blessings. Especially when we keep his commandments. But our lives are NOT determined. Yes, God knows what is going to happen but that doesn't mean you can coast through life. You gotta grab the bull by the balls, so to speak. If you want something, go get it. "Oh, I didn't get the job I wanted. Guess it wasn't meant to be. I'll just hold a little ceasars sign on the sidewalk." Can I get an AMEN?
Edited to add one more example...WARNING, its a sad example. How about stillbirth, due to doctor error? What reason did that happen for?? Maybe I'm just looking into it too literally, but if my baby passed away and I knew it was because of the doctor, I couldnt brush it off and say "Oh, these things happen for a reason."

"Never regret anything, because at the time it was something you wanted."
Yeah, at the time, you were also a big dumb idiot! Or just inexperienced with life, is a better way to put it, I guess?
People who say they never regret things [seem to be] the type of people that don't grow and progress as a person, or haven't done so yet. I've made many stupid mistakes in my life, and you better believe I wish I could have learned the lessons I did in another way. However, in a lot of ways I think I have learned life lessons by observing as well (i.e. Ya know when a girl "waits" for a missionary, and then 98% of the time one of them change their mind about the other within the next 2 years? Yeah, I gathered enough statistics to dodge that crap-fest. Its all about setting the correct expectations.)

I guess this can be good, like, I'm a HUGE worry wart..but the only person I knew to say this quote was the laziest person ever. So I don't like it.

Stress.

2011-08-01T19:09:00.000-07:00

Saturday night, I had a meltdown. Unfortunately it was in front of about 15 peers of mine that I highly respect.

I'll explain, you see. I received a text 3 weeks ago from my friend's husband inviting me to a surprise birthday party for his wife! Aw! What can I bring! I'd love to bring a salad!
OK, be there at 7:30.

(Now I thought to myself, "Self, do not be late.")

Well. We were late.

We are "those people" that are late to EVERYTHING. Last time I was on time to church? Couldn't tell ya, but good thing it isn't a temple recommend question: Do you do your best to be on time to church?

Anyway, I ask friend's husband (who is also my friend too) if he wants us to wait in the car til after she gets there so we don't spoil the surprise. He says yes, wait. So I say "Ok, let me know when we can come in". Kaius and Monroe wake up because we stop, and start with the whining and crying. 10 minutes waiting in the car goes by. I text him again and say "Wheres this chick at??" no answer. Another 10 minutes goes by and by this time Kaius is screaming bloody murder (Why...oh, my Mom said he had a poopy diaper before we left. I didn't change it, did you change it babe? aw crap.) So we drive down the road out of visual range, and change his diaper. I then text "Hey is your phone off? Cuz my kids are havin' a meltdown and I need an update" no answer. I'm thinking this poor guy is stressed to the max trying to carry out his master plan of doing something sweet for his wife, and he probably isn't looking at his phone, or he is WITH her and doesn't want his phone blowing up.
Plus, this is what we get for being late. Josh and I kept saying that. Its all our fault.
Then next 10 minutes I spend looking up white pages trying to look up her house phone number so I can call the party to see whats up. I found it! oh fax number. I don't have ANYONES number that would be at that party?? Oh, BRAD!
dialing....Hi is Brad there?
"No. This is NOT Brad's phone anymore."
Woops, sorry buddy.
After a half hour of waiting I just run to the house, stealth style. Knock on the door and I see everyone is having a lovely meal. Real cool, friend's husband, real cool. He realizes he forgot to send me the text to come in and I see how sorry he is. I could see it on his face, he feels so bad. I say its not his fault, but say we have to leave because I'm too stressed out. The chin starts trembling and I jet off back to the car. Total diva style.

Josh and I talked..why am I so stressed out? Oh yeah. Cuz I am lacking some serious Zumba in my life. I used to go every day of the week, but since we moved, I haven't found a class I like. I'm picky. Kaius is in his terrible twos....WAY bad right now. Its like he has a goal to make me raise my voice at him. He likes me to yell at him. I give him TONS of positive attention when he does something awesome. Which is, like, currency in our house. Remember that facebook status "AAAAH TODDLER FOR SALE!!" (which was just a joke, CPS) its because he pretty much landed on Monroe's face with his elbow. He gets frustrated and hits us or bites us. Whatever, bottom line, I need a freakin break. A daily break to go exercise and be away from the crazies.

My lovely sister Jana invited me a week ago or so to come to California to get certified to be a Zumba instructor. Josh and I decided last night, we're gunna do it. He said if it makes me happy, do it. He said "I am pro-you being happy".
So, we booked our flight (our only and last chance EVER to have both kids on a flight with us, for FREEEEEEEEEEEEE since they are both under 2. Kaius will turn 2 like a week after we get back.

Oh, and its with Gina Grant, who is a big celebrity I guess in the Zumba world!

All my Zumba girls were jealous, anyway.
I'm pumped!!!

Laundry Stain Remover & Other Mushy Stuff

2011-07-28T13:26:00.000-07:00

Been a long-time lover of

Shout Advanced. I still have a bottle I'm using actually. But the last few times I've gone to my Dad's in California, he keeps asking me if I've tried this stuff

If you see the little picture on top, its a picture of clothes (pants, shirt, shorts) on a clothesline. He has told me all the things he's gotten out of clothes using it. Oil, grease, blood, etc. And I go, "cool Dad" and then I forget every time I go to Wal Mart. Well, a couple weeks ago when I was in the pharmacy section looking for mineral oil for our

Awesome lady lamp. Have you seen one of these in action, by the way? They're pretty nifty. Anyway, you know how people pick stuff up and then decide they don't want it later and then just dump it wherever (that's GOTTA be annoying for the employees) well, staring me in the face was this container of GOOP. So I snatched it.

I used it on a permanent marker stain and it reduced it significantly. Its gotten oil stains out easily.
Its around a $1 and you can find it in the automotive section. Shout is about $6 for a teensy bottle.

Josh had an oil rain lamp like the one pictured above growing up. They were common for decor in the 70's. Fits our house awesomely! So its a nostalgic piece, but not only for Josh.
Back when I thought Josh was just a good, macho friend of mine...I found out that his parents lived about 10 minutes from my Dad in California (1st date was day after Halloween). Perfect! I'll get a cheap ride since we'll split gas. Well, we pretty much fell in love the 10 hour ride there. I had thanksgiving dinner with his family and there at their house was this crazy looking unclothed (chose that word, instead of the obvious word, so people googling that word will NOT find this blog) statue rain lamp. After dinner we watched princess bride (I had never seen it before) while cuddling. He turned over to me and whispered "I love you" I let out a sigh as if to say "Finally you say it!" and told him I loved him too. We spent the rest of the night talking and pretty much decided my last name wasn't going to be Oler very much longer. No games. He was hot. I was hot. He liked me, I liked him. Lets get married. Lets have babies. Sounds great.

So, that lamp reminds me very much of that night, as it was about 3 feet from me as Josh professed his undying love for me.

Also, some other movies I had never seen before I met Josh: Dirty Dancing, Karate Kid, Casablanca, The Twilight Zone, Ferris Beuller's Day off.

Ramblings

2011-07-17T22:23:00.000-07:00

-I don't go to blogs to look at pictures. I will only read a blog if I like the writing style or I just love them. And can laugh at themselves. When people only post the rainbows and butterflies of life, I get bored. ( I do like pictures though, of course)

-Yesterday morning, Kaius climbed in bed with us and started cuddling with me. It was tender. He was still sleepy. He looked up with me and started rubbing my cheek, lovingly. Then he gave me a super cheesy smile! All of this was a rarity. Usually Daddy gets all the lovin'. Then he reached his arm up like he was stretching. His arm cocked back, and he punched me square in the nose. I was stunned. I woke up Josh and made him take Kaius to time out. I cried a little. I hate the terrible twos.

-The last week I actually tried to keep my house clean. I did laundry every day, did dishes every day, and constantly picked up everyone's crap. My house still looks like crap. So disappointing. Keeping a house clean is hard work. I feel so defeated because I feel like I gave it my all.

-You know how they make back massaging chairs? I think they should make back tickle chairs. It would have to be randomized somehow, cuz the same pattern would get annoying.

- I just recently became obsessed with lighting. I love crazy eclectic pendants and I love chandeliers. One day every room in my house will have something awesome.

-My "grown up" life is kind of how I pictured it would be, in every way. I would think that is rare for someone to feel that way, but maybe not. I always wanted to be married in the temple to someone awesome. I wanted to have a boy first, and a girl second...so he could "protect" her from smelly boys. I didn't want to marry for money like some of my friends said they wanted to (some say they wanted to marry a doctor or lawyer, but we all say crazy things as kids). I never had dreams or even thoughts of what my wedding would look/be like. It was always "who". Who will it be? Although my wedding was really special, I don't think I would have been terribly mad with just a day with Josh and I. Wow, epiphany...wedding receptions should totally be like a week after the wedding. The last thing you want to do right after you're officially husband and wife is surround yourself with a bunch of friends (and strangers) and plaster smiles on your faces. You want to get naked.

-I don't like it when people complain publicly about not having money. Especially when they are stay at home moms. It kind of knocks their husband, if he is working really hard. You should always treat your man...like a MAN. (this is not meant to hurt any feelings. Its just how I feel. Not directed passive aggressively at any one person.)

-I always wonder about the other worlds God has created. Do they have colors that we don't have here?

-I often really wish that our society didn't have a currency system. If you've read The Host by Stephenie Meyer, they don't have money to incentivize themselves to work. They all work together in their society and only take what they need. I wish we were like that. Most people aren't. Not to toot Josh's horn, well yes actually, to toot his horn...Josh likes to work. He would work if money didn't exist. He likes to help people. I, on the other hand, would LOVE to sit on the couch and do nothing. I appreciate silence so much these days.

- I am a home body. I probably leave the house maybe once during the 5 day work week. I love being home. I like going out on the weekends most of the time.

- I am not really a phone person. I text occasionally, and I will definitely talk on the phone about plans to do something or something important is going on. But I'm not the type to get to know someone over the phone. I'd rather talk face to face.

- I definitely do know there are mental disorders and that people can have chemicals in their brain to make them feel depressed or sad. I do believe that sometimes medication is needed in some cases. But I also think all humans go through ruts. I believe we have the power to change our minds by serving others, or planting a garden, or painting a picture, or..anything like that. Its different for every person of course. I think everyone feels good when they've helped someone out. I also feel I have already blogged about this.

- My Dad often tells the same stories over and over. I'm sure I'm turning into him hahaha.

- I wish I was crafty and didn't have to get all my ideas from the internet. I wish I could just think of a fabulous idea for a cute & funky pendant lamp that would cost me $5 for the light mechanism.

-I was appointed as the Chairperson (or whatever) for the Lehi High 2005 High school 10 year reunion in 2015. I'm excited but I have no idea what to do yet. Any ideas would be appreciated.

Another Mistake

2011-07-14T20:43:00.003-07:00

Sorry, H & M...thirteen grand is a little out of my price range.

I gotta get this out there.

2011-07-11T21:46:00.000-07:00

I've been kinda MIA on my blog and Facebook. Its because of this:

I aaam addicted. to.

to.

to.

ONLINE BARGAINS AND FREEBIES.
*exhales loudly*

I'm sure you've seen my posts on facebook. Free sample here, Free Swiffer 360 there, Free bottle of fabric softener, free jamberry nails, free teeth whitening pen... see? I can't stop.

I've been wanting to post this for a while. I feel obligated to share things with friends, because I spend a lot of hours each week looking for free stuff and bargains...I want to benefit more than myself. I always think "Oh, everyone should get this pack of 40 batteries for $8...to have in their food storage stuff for flashlights" or something like that. So I'm just gunna post what I've found to be helpful.

Read it or ignore it.

I'm just going to purge it and then it wont be bugging me.

I check thedealyo.com and freebies2deals.com each day a few times each. I also follow them on facebook and sometimes they'll tell me about something urgent that I GOTTA have.

I take online surveys for $$, or test out products for either free, cheap, or THEY pay ME. For example, at Vindale.com They had an offer for mineral makeup, you pay $10 for the trial, but they put $15 in your account. -$10+$15=+$5 !

They paid ME to try their makeup. Then after you try it, you fill out a survey on how you liked the product/ordering process. They usually credit your account on Vindale very quickly.

For months I always thought "What the heck is Swagbucks, and why do so many of my friends post about it??
I'll sum it up.
Do you use GOOGLE, YAHOO, or BING search engines? Well, Swagbucks is the same thing, only you get points for using their website to search (its random, like every 8th search or so you get points). Then with your points, you can get giftcards. I find the most popular one to get is the $5 amazon giftcard. I've only been on there 4 months or so, and I've earned 2 Amazon giftcards. There are MANY other ways of earning 'Bucks (surveys, special offers like netflix, etc) But I choose not to, out of laziness.

Ok. There ya go. I'll only blog about awesome family stuff now :)

PHOTOSHOPPED??

2011-07-10T22:07:00.001-07:00

I mean, COME ON. If you're gunna do it, do it well.

Xena Warrior Princess

2011-06-21T09:48:00.000-07:00

4/8/1998 (11 years old)

Xena was out one day and it started to rain Zombies and Xena slit their throats! So all the people moved to different places like: Alaska, Hawaii, Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia, Jamaica, Greece, Iceland and Greenland. It only took a minute, by foot!
And it got worse and worse, and I got sad and I cried and then I got even more sad I cried apples and shared them with my friends.

[Where the crap did I come up with this stuff?]

"I'm Living in a Shoe!"

2011-06-13T10:34:00.000-07:00

Carly O. English Class Journal Entry [short story, I'm guessing was that days assignment]

10/21/1997 (that would be....4th grade? I was 10.)

Hello, I'm the girl that lives in a shoe, people think my house is Bigfoot's owners shoe that got lost a long time ago, but it is not. You people probably think I'm a hermit! I'm not that either, and guess how I do it, everyday (really early) I go to Taco Bell, that's where I work and eat there every night, and if you think that I live in a nasty stinky sneaker! You are wrong. I live in a wonderful boot it is so fancy and big because it is a giants shoe (to other people) So now you know my secret so you better shut up about it.

[None of the grammar or punctuation has been changed.]

I just found this on my husband's desk. He got it from my Mom, I'm guessing.

I think I'm paranoid.

2011-06-12T21:07:00.001-07:00

I don't know how many times this weekend I asked in a panic "Where's Kaius??!" and someone says, "Right over there." while thinking, "Ya crazy phsyco...".

I have an overwhelming fear that something bad will happen to my child. Drown, run in front of a car, get kidnapped. It all happens too often. You hear about it all the time.

Last night I had a dream we were driving in Hawaii in a UPS type truck (which doesn't have a door on one side) and Kaius jumped out when we weren't looking, and I saw him cross the street in the sideview mirror. Josh didn't believe me so he didn't stop (dumb dream) so I jumped out and rolled. I ran uphill to find him and he was walking out of someones house. I was relieved, then noticed he only had one of his Vans on. So I went in to talk to the owners and ask if they had it/thank them or whatever. Long story short, the Hawaiian dude wouldn't give the shoe back and said to 'tell my little man if he ever came back, he'd take the other shoe too' and then said "Alright come on the 17th and you can have his shoe and his stuff back" what the freak?? his stuff? I looked at Kaius, he was wearing old tattered T-shirt and sweats. And a different diaper. "You CHANGED my son's diaper?!??"
I was about to go ape, but Josh woke me up. I groaned, "Worst dream ever."

Am I crazy? Or smart?

Here is a typical interaction of Kaius & Monroe, just for kicks :)

Patient Beware.

2011-06-03T08:59:00.000-07:00

Honestly, in the last 2 years, I have had every. single. medical bill overcharge me.
Every single one (ok, every single doctor office/hospital)! (this is more of a vent than an informative post)

Pregnant with Kaius, doc office billed some random insurance, instead of the insurance I GAVE THEM. I got 4 full bills from like Aetna or something for hundreds of dollars and they took forever to correct it. I blogged about it a long time ago cuz I was pregnant and cranky and if I didn't vent I was going to go down there and shove the Aetna bill down the billing girl's throat.
Kaius Hospital stay; Remember the whole "no one in the universe told us we needed to call to add our baby to our policy" thing? Well, not the doctor office's fault...
Pregnant with Monroe, moved away and got a new doctor...old doctor sends me a bill for the full amount of prenatal care. I called them and they were like "Oh thats weird, (add nonsense about whoever billed this messed up) we didn't bill your insurance at all...sorry! disregard your bill."
ER trip for the chicken bone in my throat. They billed my insurance and then sent me the bill for the remainder. I called my insurance and just asked them to look at it. The lady offered to call the hospital. She put me on hold, called them, then came back and said "They didn't bill us for the full amount, so go ahead and disregard your bill"
Monroe Hospital stay, I get a rather large bill for. I call my insurance and they tell me the hospital is overcharging me, that they paid all but a couple hundred for my portion. So I call hospital...and what do I get told?? "Oh, thats weird, how does billing you for that much make sense (add nonsense about whoever billed this messed up) diregard your bill, I'll get it taken care of."

So, people, never just accept that a bill is correct. They make mistakes ALL THE TIME. and in my case, it LITERALLY IS ALL THE TIME. Can you tell I'm a bit angry? I could have just paid them and gone about my business...and I'm sure most people just do.

Sorry for the boring rant, here's a cute picture

Motherhood Lately

2011-06-01T10:59:00.000-07:00

I've really enjoyed being a mom lately, more than ever. Kaius has been pretty good lately. He is so loving and he always wants to help us out. He even is listening to me a little bit when I say "Please don't do that". But, he has started planting a fat kiss on me whenever he's being a little naughty. Or he'll just do it randomly. When he gets an owee, he wants me to kiss it better.

He was helping Josh wash the car.

Playing with a cousin :)

Uncle Ryan :)

Monroe is getting to be more "social" as the babycenter emails say. She smiles at us and my favorite is when she lets out a loud *sigh*. She's so dainty and lovely. And a great napper and sleeps well most nights. So, she's my best friend.

A couple weeks ago we went to Memory Grove. It was so fun! And beautiful.

This picture looks so much like me as a toddler. I'll find a pic of me and post it someday.

...bones.

They are so cute. I mean handsome and stud muffinish.

Oh, and since I've watched Nemo a bajillion times, I've really realized what a HUGE jErK Marlin (Nemo's Dad) is! I mean, I get that he's stressed trying to find his son and all, but man he is rude. And Katie, from Horton Hears a Who, is psychoooo.

Tee hee

2011-05-24T21:15:00.001-07:00

Mini Me? & Giveaway Winner

2011-05-17T20:05:00.000-07:00

Here's the whole pic, without my Dad cut out :D

And now for the Giveaway Winner.
Since there were 5 entries I went to random.org, put 1-5 and the generator gave me 5 (I did that just in case he couldn't choose one) . Without disclosing to Josh who the random winner was, I had him read the entries. He had me blow the picture up, then bring a separate window up with the captions. He thought they were all funny, but laughed at the last one the most. So, Mom, this zebra bow was MEANT to be yours. And you better wear it all the time ;)

My First Giveaway

2011-05-13T17:20:00.000-07:00

That's right...Mrs. Mormon Mommy Nobody is having a giveaway. :)

This isn't to get more followers (since I make a whole $0 blogging), maybe to get more blog-stalkers to come out of the closet ;)

Plus, I just like you guys. And I want to be entertained. So, I'm giving away this bow from QT Pie Creations!

To Enter:

1. Comment leaving a Caption for Josh in this picture:

Giveaway ends Sunday night...sometime. I'll have Josh pick the best one, or I'll choose randomly if there are too many good ones. Make sure you leave a way for me to contact you if your google profile is private.

4 Generation Picture

2011-05-11T13:18:00.000-07:00

So, I think the ladies surrounding me in the picture look beautiful. Me- not so much.

I think I've been struggling more this time around with the baby weight. Ok, or else I just forgot last time around how hard it was. I didn't find Zumba until Kaius was already 3 months. Then I kicked the exercise and healthy eating to full throttle (except that calories don't count on the weekend...I don't believe in depriving myself.)

Holy Tangent.

My apologies.

The pic:

Words cant express. Or is it a thousand words?

Shaving Tips & Morning Breath Help

2011-05-09T15:01:00.000-07:00

Yup, shaving tips. Never know whatchur gunna get here.

Armpits- There is no wrong way to do it. Normally you'd shave the opposite direction of hair growth...but your armpits grow all sorts of directions. So shave up, down, sideways, slantways.

Knees- Seem to always miss spots? Try locking your knee (straighten your leg). It seems like you will cut yourself, but you wont. I mean, the risk of cutting doesn't go up. Just try it.

Would you like to be rid of morning breath? Are you willing to pay $ to be rid of it?

Try THIS for $10:

Whenever Josh would roll my direction in the middle of the night, and I happened to be facing him, and he would let out a big breath, and I would die (jk)...I had to find a solution. I've tried Thera breath but didn't like that so much.

Naptime

2011-05-01T10:16:00.000-07:00

So I was putting Kaius down for a nap today. We sang our fun songs (do as I'm doing, once there was a snowman, and popcorn popping...it gets him to like me and then calm down to sleep) and then I started to sing "I am a Child of God" to get him to sleep. I was halfway through the second verse when he sat up, put his index finger up to his lips, and "shooshed" me. Then he laid back down and fell asleep.

First Joint Doctor Appt.

2011-04-28T14:49:00.000-07:00

There was no way I was making 2 separate "well baby" appointments, and I made sure Josh could come with. It would have been a circus had he not been with us.
The nurse that was taking Kai's height/weight was rushing around and her demeanor was like she was super stressed out...which obviously made Kaius feel the same and he was completely freaked out. When the doctor came in and was testing his reflexes (hitting his knees) He started hitting her back!! It was pretty bad. Josh and I have NEVER seen him act that way. He didnt even have to get any shots this time (thank GOODNESS) but he was acting like he was abducted by aliens.

Monroe was great. She has already gained 2 lbs since birth...yeah she is over 10 lbs..that surprised me. She sleeps through the night (hallelujah) and I will always try to wake her up once or twice to eat. Sometimes she will, sometimes she wont. She is 90th percentile in weight, 75th in height. I feel so blessed. I know that I am.

We got Kaius to say Monroe's full name: "Man-roe"
Every male toy he has is "man", and he often says "ooh, MAN" if he gets hurt or whatever.
He will try to say anything we ask. I've been really excited for this stage. I think its one of the funnest stages.

We got Monroe's newborn pics done this week. We did some family pictures too. I also asked my Mom and Grandma to come, so we could do a generation picture. I think I am most excited to see those pics, with all 4 generations. My little brother, Matthew, doesn't have any grandparents [living]. My Dad just pointed that out to me this last week. I kinda doubted him at first, like, 'yeah right...everyone has grandparents...duh' but after I thought about it...he will never know what its like to be all excited to see your grandma and grandpa at their cool house and have them spoil you with treats and toys. I feel so bad for him. I mean, I think he gets spoiled in other ways (i.e. he's been to Hawaii like 4 times at least, and he's 8. He has 2 power wheels and all I ever wanted growing up was one. But I digress) But its still not the same.
I am so blessed to still have my Grandma and Grandpa with us. I always have wanted a picture with my Grandma, Mom, and Daughter. Not everyone gets that opportunity. When Family came in town for Kai's blessing, I was sure to do a Generation shot with Josh, his Dad, and Grandpa.

Popular Kids Shows

2011-04-26T21:48:00.000-07:00

Ok so, Imagination Movers

Yo Gabba Gabba

Blues Clues

The Wiggles

These are all popular kids' shows right? What do they all have in common?

They all have adult males in them. Who dance around crazily to annoying music. And, if its not too rude to add, they are all ugly.

Why do kids like this? When I was little, I liked watching other little kids on TV. Like, Barney...or on Full House I would always like to watch the scenes with kids in them the most, I was annoyed with the adult scenes. I guess because I could relate to them? I do not see how I would EVER relate to any of the males above.

Its actually quite creepy in my book. I mean, I have watched the news recently...you really can't trust anyone these days. I can't stop picturing a group of sex offenders dressed as the wiggles and frequenting the local elementary school in their big Astro van.
.

Anyway. Did ya'll see the new Charmin commercial, where the momma bear is lint rolling the baby bear....and she brushes the lint roller across his bottom????????

I HAAAAATE CHARMIN COMMERCIALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nursery Pictures

2011-04-19T12:02:00.001-07:00

Cute stuff I've made:

{diaper clutch}

{bow holder & headband holder}

Got the frame half off at Hobby Lobby

Oatmeal cyllinder, mod podged

(ps..don't waste your time getting cute ribbon...cuz you cant see 'em)
I upgraded the space to this

I went from just the one pink kissing ball from this post, to this:

And then finally to this:

~White tissue lantern~Hot pink rosette kissing ball~Hot pink tulle ball~Chocolate brown rosette kissing ball~
(I just googled tutorials on them, and got help from Hilary on the white ball..she had them at her wedding :)

(don't worry, that chandelier is hangin in there good. :)

I got the idea from The Newlywed Game set.

I started feeling bad because Kai's side of the room was ho hum compared to Monroe's. I asked Josh if I should make some tissue lanterns in boy colors and he said NO, that's sissy. Get some sports balls or something. So..I did.

Monroe 1 week old

2011-04-16T09:12:00.000-07:00

So far, here are some facts:

♥ Recovering from a vaginal delivery is much harder than I expected. I thought I'd be all better by now, but turns out it takes most women about 2 weeks before they feeling of being hit by a truck goes away. The pelvis part is probably the worst. Its sore...
♥ My Mom is the best Mom ever. She totally saved me this week. She watched Kaius the whole time we were in the hospital, making it a very relaxing experience for Josh and I. And we were able to bond with our princess.
♥ Kaius cries way more often than Monroe.
♥ Monroe sleeps all day. AND all night. Wonderful. (ok, not all night, she wakes up twice to eat...not bad)
♥ I got mastitis AGAIN. Hense previous post. Felt like I was gunna die yesterday, but got some antibiotics and am feeling much better today. Roe just sleeps so much and isn't keeping up with the milk. And I don't want to pump because that will just exacerbate the problem.
♥ Kaius has never gotten jealous of the attention Monroe gets. He is only jealous that WE are holding her, and not him. He always wants to hold and kiss her. Its a dream come true.

Dear Body,

2011-04-15T11:22:00.000-07:00

Did you think you birthed twins? Milk just for one, please. And don't listen to Josh when he says he likes the H cups, he doesn't know what he's talking about. kthxbye.

I don't mean to brag, but..

2011-04-13T13:43:00.000-07:00

Oh wait, yeah. I do.

(Kaius-6 days) (Monroe-5 days)

Ha, I just noticed that they both have the same blanket in this picture. :D

So Blessed

2011-04-10T17:09:00.000-07:00

The last day has probably been the most amazing day of my life. I'm so grateful that I was able to have a successful VBAC without having a horrible tear like I feared. I was able to be apart of Monroe's firsts, something I only got to see in pictures with Kaius. Bathing her, being able to hold her straight from the womb, walking around afterward.

I'm so grateful for my Mom. She has watched Kaius and allowed us to have a relaxing experience bonding with Monroe. I thought from her personality in the womb that she'd be a sassy diva, but she is the chillest baby ever. It has only been a day..so that can change anytime :) She feeds like a champ. She rarely cries but one time Josh couldn't get her to stop and she was rooting. He tried giving her a binky because she ate recently, but it didn't help. He handed her to me and -boom- no more crying. She might be a Mama's girl :)
(Really, though, I think it was because she smelled me)

She takes a binky( yaaaaAAAAAAAY!). Something Kaius never ever liked. I have a feeling Kaius will have a problem with it for the first little bit. He has had so many different brands of binkies, but they all ended up as toys. So I think he'll take them out of her mouth, like in the car and stuff. We'll see.

It was so nice to get a visit from my best girls today. And they both gave super cute gifts, thanks so much Cammie and Kenz! I doubt either of their husbands wanted to come but they did, thanks guys (like they'll ever read this ;)

This hospital is awesome. They brought Josh and I sacrament today and blessed it with us. We were so grateful for that. Also, there is unlimited room service for me, whenever I'm hungry. My doctor was amazing and she's delivered over 7,500 babies. I hope she is still delivering babies when(if) I have my next. I know it will be a while if we do have more. I'm a lazy bump on a log when I'm pregnant and I don't want to be that anymore. I want to be a fun mom. I want to take my kids outside once a day at least. I want to have a clean kitchen like I used to.
Monroe, the doll she is, was sweet enough to get Kaius a present! It's coming in the mail this week.

Not that he needs help adjusting... he LOVES her. She is HIS baby. A nurse had to take her away for about five minutes today for the hearing test...and he was NOT letting Monroe out of his sight. He just had to go with. It was so cute. I know I'm going to be spending a lot of time nursing, so I thought he'd have a blast with this lil structure.

I just have a hard time grasping how lucky I am. These are mine. Forever. I get to keep them. Doesn't hurt that they are the cutest babies ever ;)

How To Keep Your House Clean When You Have Small Children

2011-04-06T09:02:00.000-07:00

You can't.

Ramblings...

2011-04-01T09:11:00.000-07:00

I'm just gunna blog so I can remember this time of my life better.

Basically, I'm annoyed.

I went to the doctor on Tuesday (day after my birthday, thanks for all the happy birthday wishes :) and while she was "checking" me, uh, it hurt. She was goin in all sorts of directions and finally pronounces "you are at a 2 and 80% effaced". That night, the BACK LABOR started. That was fun. But I was lucky and it only lasted an hour. Contractions haven't stopped since. I'm pretty sure she stripped my membranes, at least a little bit. Without telling me.
So I have no idea when the baby is going to come. And I am freaking out trying to get everything ready. We finally bought a changing table and breastpump last night off of KSL...$115 for both...yeah, I'm a hussla.
I finally finished the bow holder. Still working on the wood letters for the wall...
I'll post pictures later. Too busy for that.

Every time a contraction hurts I wig out, in my head. The thought of 2 kids is starting to terrify me. Kaius is just at that age where he is learning how to get into everything and wont listen to any "don't touch that's" or "please don't's". I remember when Kaius was a newborn, every waking moment I was a prisoner on the couch breastfeeding.

And if I have a successful VBAC, but I tear really bad, I'm gunna be TICKED. I would imagine in some ways that is WORSE than recovering from a c-section. Then I'd have 2 scars. Wonderful! But, ya know, worth it.

Wow this post might be TMI for some people. Oh well!

Back to the birthday, it was a great day. I woke up to a funny "hoops & yoyo" card from Josh and Kaius. When Josh went to work, a treasure hunt was in store for me! I had notes sending me all around the house and it was really cute. I got to go with my Mom for a pedicure, it was sooo relaxing. I swear they massaged my legs longer than usual, probably cuz I'm pregnant ;).

Baby High Heels

2011-03-25T12:13:00.000-07:00

I think Heelarious high heels for baby girls are SO cute, and funny!

Apparently there is a lot of controversy with these...but mostly because people don't realize they are NOT for WALKING babies. The heel is collapsible, and is for babies 0-6m.

And my personal favorite (of course):

BUT, those hot pink patent ones are sold out EVERYWHERE. In fact, they stopped making them. But I had to check everywhere before I could rest. I got the LAST PAIR at theathleteschild.com!
(If you wanted to buy some, let me know and I'll give you a sweet coupon code)
The boutique price for these is $80, but I got THREE pairs for that price...with the coupon code I googled. I'm so excited!

Oh, and I ordered a hot pink pair from TheRoyalNursery.com and they didnt contact me for a WEEK, even thought I emailed and called a million times. They finally emailed me today and told me they credited my account because they are sold out. Dumbheads.
Here are some cute babies in them:

While I'm on the subject of cute baby stuff...My best friend (and fave Zumba instructor) Cammie got me this onesie...

Cuz I Zumba'd a TON during this pregnancy :D

And, I'm sorry, I just cannot post this without saying, these are the best pictures I could find on google image search of these onesies. The poor baby is in such an awkward position in both pictures. I will one day post a much cuter picture showcasing the awesome outfit! Thanks Cammie!

I'm Sorry, but...

2011-03-23T21:18:00.000-07:00

How is this fad...a fad?

*This post is for entertainment purposes and not for the purpose of hurting your feelings.

The Amazing Elegant Designer Baby Girl Bedding. And a Craft.

2011-03-20T21:02:00.000-07:00

Feast your eyes on THIS

My MOM made this!!!!!!!! We just got it all set up, and I can't get a very good picture. Sun has gone down so I can't get any natural light.

Isn't it GORGEOUS?? It takes my breath away. I can't believe I am having another baby. Such a miracle.

My mom has worked countless hours on this. I did stuff the bumpers though....which was a PICNIC....But I wanted them puffy like that, so for the last while we've been going over to my moms and working on it every weekend. Its been awesome to hang out there. We don't have TV, so Josh gets to watch his precious sports.

Last weekend we did a family photo shoot/maternity shoot with Madalyn. It was so much fun. Can't wait to see the pictures. Kaius was feeling under the weather, and wasn't that into kissing my belly :( Oh well.

Oh, now I've added something to the nursery...

I got this idea from theidearoom. However, her tutorial is kind of REALLY hard to understand. It took me forever trying different ways on how to do the rosettes, and finally when I just stopped trying so hard they looked good.
Can you believe something so elegant came from some cheesy party streamers?

We were at Zurchers looking for the streamer and Josh was like "Uh, you need this for what?" and I tried to explain you fold it in half and roll it up into a little rose and glue it on this styrofoam ball (which are ridiculously expensive...I thought they'd be like a dollar, try $14!!) And Josh was like oookay...this will be interesting. But when he saw my finished product, he was awe struck :D

I am SO not a crafty person, but I wish I was. I'm trying. Its just hard for me to go to craft stores and actually BUY everything. I think its the frugal girl in me.

It's Been Hectic, Man.

2011-03-17T18:14:00.000-07:00

-I called Josh on March 8th at 4 pm, about 10 minutes after I had hung up with him last, and said "Happy Anniversary"
He said, "what?"
"Happy Anniversary," I repeated.
"Is that the only reason why you called?" he asked.
"Yes"
"Did you just realized just now that its our anniversary?" He asks.
"Yes...didn't you?"
"...yes."

He totally tried to play it off like he knew, but he didn't. We both had no clue.

So we went to Cafe Rio!!!!

Then on Saturday we went to my Moms to work on [baby girl]'s bedding, I found a couple movie ticket pass thingies in my purse so we went and saw "Just Go With It" because 2 of my best friends recommended it, both out of nowhere, don't know each other, and it was on the same day (the day we moved). It was really funny, Josh and I laughed a lot.
So we did get to go out on a date. Its been a long time since it was just us 2. It really brought us back to the giddy stage and we need to go out more often.
Back to the bedding, just wait til you all see this bedding. It is out of this world cute. And SO froofy, which I didn't think was my style, but I totally love it and its designed by me and my mom! (Plus we stole an idea from etsy...but we aren't paying $300 for something we could do for a fraction of the cost, plus make it cuter.)
I think it will all be done by this weekend. I can't wait to blog about it.

On Sunday, we spoke in church. I made lots of pregnancy jokes/made fun of how huge I was. A lady told me afterward that she liked me :D And a lady told my mom (who was watching Kaius) that she liked me and I'm gunna fit in just great here :D:D
My talk was 80% introducing us/20% on the Spirit of Elijah. Then Josh got up there and did great, but he would speak every Sunday. He likes that stuff.
A few hours before I spoke though, I started feeling sick. Kaius had already been coughing for a few days...but bouncing off the walls still.
Me...not so much. Body aches, cough, sore throat, yada yada. Finally got an antibiotic though, today.

We finally got internet at our house. Before I was just using Josh's phone...which is like looking at the internet through mud. Ok not really, but its not as cool. I have been really out of the loop, though. I didn't have facebook to remind me it was my anniversary, I was the last person in the world to find out about the earthquake in Japan, and I didn't know it was St. Patrick's day today. Oh well, all I did was sit around with my double ear ache and yell at Kaius. What a fun mom I am. Maybe I'll make some green pancakes when he gets home from his boys night out with Josh to watch the BYU game at Iggy's.

Something I've been meaning to blog about: Don't you want to be friends with this guy in real life?

We think he's hilarious.

Well, I think this is enough jumbled, jarbled crap for one post...lets blame all the cold medicine, please.

Surprise Shower and an Update

2011-02-21T09:33:00.000-08:00

I am going to miss the northern UT area we just moved from. Some friends we get together with for FHE every week had us over for dinner last week. We had yummy chicken (hence the previous post) and potatoes. Oh, and chocolate cheesecake that was diVINE. I pretty much pigged out. Then my back was turned for like two seconds, and all these girly pink presents were on the table! Surprise! It was the night our car broke down (on the way home from the shop...double grrr) and I was so emotional I started tearing up again. Such a nice thing to do for us.

Im blogging with Josh's phone, and it sucks. But we are loving the new area we are living in. Our first Sunday at our new ward was...interesting, but good. The first few people we talked to told us we might not be in their ward boundaries..okaaay..even though it says so online? And a lot of people just assumed we were visiting instead of asking if we were new or visiting. We talked to the bishop and he said they have quite a few people that just show up wanting to be in that ward that live far away. Makes more sense.

Kaius has been transitioning to the toddler bed and is doing awesome. At first he would wake up crying like he had NO idea where he was. Poor fella. But every night he does better.

The Chicken Bone E.R. Visit

2011-02-17T08:23:00.001-08:00

So the other night I was eating some chicken off of a bone and I swallowed and felt something pricking my tongue when I swallowed. It wouldn't move! I tried to find it with my finger but I couldnt. I couldn't tell if it was in my tongue or the back of my throat. I had Josh try to look with his bright flashlight on his new HTC phone (We scored it for free at T-Mobile's promotion last weekend!) But he couldn't see it.

Yesterday he was asking if it was still there, and told me I should call a doctor or something so it doesn't get infected. Well, we are a one car family, so I called the pediatric dentistry across the street and the receptionist kind of laughed and said "Um, I've never dealt with that but we don't work on patients over 13, but let me refer you to a dentist 5 miles away..."
I said "No thanks, I don't have a car right now. Thanks anyway."
So then I called my Dentist. The receptionist and I have talked many times and she knew who I was before I said my name. I told her the situation, and she said that was a new one for her, so she put me on hold and asked about it. She said because it was past the dangly thing in the back of my throat, I need to go to the emergency room.
I kind of laughed and said "I can't just go to a regular doctor?" and she said "No, you definitely need to go to the E.R."
I said "Well, why? Will it get infected or something?"
She basically just said that just wasn't their area and suggested again to go to the E.R.

So I hang up with her and call a family practice doctor, and the receptionist transfers me to a nurse in the Urgent Care. She says they wont be able to help me there, and to go to the E.R., especially because its a chicken bone and will get infected very fast.
Now I'm really starting to freak out. A trip to the E.R. isn't cheap. So I turn to my Facebook friends. Everyone says to go. Tears!
So I ask my BabyCenter birth group. They say go. Because of infection. One dumb girl says "If you can't afford to go to the E.R., how are you going to afford a baby"
(Tangent Alert)Exhibit A of why I HATE babycenter. Everytime I post, theres always one or two that have to ignore the whole point of the post and say something extremely negative and rude...because they are anonymous. I freaked out on her, I said "If a girl in real life was telling you about her stressing out about how to pay for a $250 copay for a STUPID E.R. trip...would say to her 'How are you going to pay for a baby if you can't pay for an E.R. visit?' Well, maybe you would say that, but I wouldn't. That's rude." (Tangent over)
So I finally call Josh and tell him what's up. Not exciting. I call one of my best friends from the ward and see if she can babysit. Leeann is the best. She was so willing to help any way she could. Such a blessing.

We head off the the hospital. The nurses checking me in thought the situation was bizarro.

Ok, I'm 32 weeks pregnant. I am huge.

The doctor walks in and asks me to explain the situation. He puts numbing stuff on the back of my throat so I don't gag, and starts pokin around. He finally stops and says "I don't know if this is something I can get. I may have you go home and see what your body does with it (it may push it out, or your body might absorb it and dissolve it) and then I will give you a recommendation for an ENT" which, apparently is "eyes, nose, throat"
I kind of had an attitude...explained I did my research and was told this would get infected easily because its chicken, etc. I said its already been in there 24 hours...I've been eating all day...I've tried getting it out on my own, etc. So he comes back with a big machine, its a bright headlamp. He has Josh hold my tongue down with a stick and he holds some tissue down next to the dangly thing (formal name is Ugula..or somethin) and he keeps having me feel the bone with my finger. The area is very swollen by now. Josh points out there is a concentrated dark red dot. "You see it, Doc?" He asks. That Josh. He's so cute.
And the doctor pulled it out!!!! He was so surprised...he said he was just grabbing blindly with tweezers. I was like "GIVE ME THAT!" And I examined it. Yuck.

This is the best picture we could get. You can't really see well, but the bone turns from brown to white and curves up at the tip..and is very fine also. The white part is what was sticking out of my skin. The rest was in my throat. Thats pretty long! I mean, that thing was IN THERE. No way my body was getting it out.

We are all ready for this week from H-E- to be over! (Another reason why is because we had to take our car to the shop TWICE this week)

Our VaLenTiMes Day!

2011-02-15T09:48:00.000-08:00

I usually find it really annoying when people say "Valentimes", but recently I saw a craft on a blog, wooden blocks with letters on them that read "Happy Valentimes Day" And it looked really cute written out.

Anyway, it was a normal day (minus the part about looking for a sitter all day) until Josh got home. We got ready to Zumba and took Kaius to a friend's house. I had been begging Josh to come with me to this "Zumba with Your Valentine" event for weeks. He usually coaches volleyball Monday nights, but they didn't have practice. He was fully mentally prepared to Zumba. I told him it would be my Valentines gift if he went. Malan (Cammie's Huz) was excited to know there was going to be another guy there. Cuz he kind of had no choice :D

The guys did SO good though! I think there was a total of 5 guys there. It was a fun atmosphere and Josh and I got DOWN. hahaha. Josh kept pointing out what kind of music it was, what language they were speaking, and sometimes what kind of dancing Cammie was doing. He would be like "Oh this is Samba!" and I have no idea if he was right. But it was a blast.

Then we went home and he whipped out this gorgeous butterfly headband. I love butterflies.

I had tried it on when we went to Claires on Saturday, I saw a little 4 month baby girl was getting her ears pierced and I wanted to watch. It was very sad. Most babies I've heard of getting immunizations cry for a minute and that's all. This little girl cried like she was in pain for a long time. I learned I definitely wont be going to Claires for it if I end up doing it. I just didn't get the feel that the girl was confident that she knew what she was doing. If anyone has advice on that, lets hear it.
Also, Josh got some flower hair clips! White daisies with pink plaid centers. So mommy and baby girl can match!

Oh, and for Josh, I made him a nice feast with BBQ ribs, Garlic Shrimp, cardiac mashed potatoes, cheesy broccoli, and crescent rolls. That's not all he got, but this is a family friendly blog.

Opposite of a Vent!!!!

2011-02-08T12:21:00.000-08:00

This is going to be the view from my living room.

Ok, not really. kinda.

We finally FINALLY found a place to move. Its been so annoying to tell people for the last 3 months "Oh yeah, we're moving in a few weeks" and then we never do... But we finally are! Im so excited! This place was our first choice but we thought it was long gone for sure. For those of you on pins and needles wanting to know if we are in the Prophet's ward, we aren't. But our meeting house is cute!

Now where am I going to Zumba?? I looked on zumba.com and I really don't have many options. So, Cammie, I'm just gunna put you in my lil pocket and take you with me :)
Really, though, I'm so picky. So maybe I'll finally get Zumba certified and teach my own classes (aka, *try*to teach identical classes to Cammie's.)

Also, I'd like you to meet Kaius' celebrity crush:

If one of these commercials come on, no matter where he is in the house, he rushes over to watch. Josh and I think he likes the sound of her voice. Otherwise, he isn't too interested in TV. He'll watch Mickey Mouse Club House for a minute or two, but then he's on to something else. He calls it "Hot Dog" though, because of the Hot Dog Song.

Lately he has been attempting to say "Please". Comes out as "Peeeeee"
He also says "Love you", comes out as "Ahhh Ooooo"
Kaius, say "Mom" and he says "Mom". Kaius, say "Mommy" and he says "Baboo". We can't figure it out haha. He still calls me Daddy when I come home from Zumba.
He has never ever said anything like "no" "don't" "stop" or "mine". awesome!
When he wants a diaper change he says "Bopper" for Diaper. His favorite words are definitely "touchdown" and "football". He always asks Daddy to watch football. Which is the greatest thing ever for Josh. I'm happy for him.

Just a Vent

2011-02-07T13:08:00.000-08:00

I'm totally letting these pregnancy hormones get to me, I think.
But I'm completely stressed out to the max. I am the biggest worry wart ever. I don't know where I got it. My mom is a good support and has always had the attitude that "it will all work out" which I KNOW full well it always does, yet I worry and stress anyway. But I feel like I need to list my stresses. Its all a jumbled jarbled mess in my head and I'm just trying to ignore it but it has put me in a funky haze.

-We are trying to find a place to move into, but you would NOT believe how many landlords trying to get renters in will NEVER EVER EVER answer their FREEEEEEKING phones!!!! We spent all afternoon Saturday looking and we looked at about 5 places and only ONE place answered their phones (the others were either unlocked, or we looked through the windows. yes, we're creepy.)

-The move itself. Not so much the packing and moving. I've had lots of friends offer to come help pack, and I know the trusty Elder's Quorum will be there on moving day. Its the idea of unpacking-before-baby-gets-here-in-2-months that is completely freaking me out.

-Being pregnant with a toddler is not fun. I'm such a boring mom. No energy to do anything. House is a sty. I would always think to myself with my 1st pregnancy "How do people do this with a toddler running around"? And you know what? I don't really do it. I don't know how they do it, but I'm not them. Kaius has days where he will do something over and over that is naughty and he gets put in time out every time. He's in time out right now. I hope he just falls asleep there. I really can't handle it at the moment. All my energy goes into picking him up and putting him over the gate all day for TO. (oh, and feeding him and changing his diapers)

-Our car has been making a really loud noise, and after asking my Dad, its gunna cost around $500. Sweet.

-My mom is making baby Girl's crib bedding. The fabric place sent the wrong color of hot pink fabric. Well I havent seen it yet. But I want it HOT pink, like this:

Not pale pink:

But this color is listed as hot pink!!! Stupids!

-I can't find my battery charger anywhere for my camera. Hence the lack of big belly pictures and updated cuteness from Kaius.

I've decided.

2011-02-03T13:15:00.000-08:00

VBAC.

Freakin' out.

(If you don't know what that is, just google it.)

(And you know, the one thing I feel like I missed out on with my previous birthing experience, was that I didn't experience my *water breaking* somewhere random and then pack up and go to the hospital all excited.)

Ramblings

2011-02-01T22:48:00.000-08:00

I wish I kept better track of my pregnancy last time. I just guess I figured every pregnancy would be the same. It might be the same, but I just don't remember. I swear I'm bigger this time, but i never measured once. I started measuring in toilet paper last week and I was 10.5 squares (at 28 weeks). This week I am 11 squares.
Today is the day that the "big" comments are getting to annoy me. Its because I'm starting to feel fat. I feel like my arms don't look good in tanks anymore. Good thing my mom just got me some cute tees to workout in! And she got me a support band too...best purchase she's ever made!! $6 at kid to kid!!! Why have I never heard that those are so awesome?? I've only heard of them..no reviews or anything.

I've tried to hold in the "Crazy" this time around. I try to recognize when my feelings are irrational. But tonight Mrs. crazy was UN-leashed.
I haven't had a clean house in a while. I'm just too tired and lazy and big. Even though Josh always tells me I'm doing a great job with everything...having dinner ready when he gets home and cleaning the house...I just am hard on myself.
I had a sink full of dishes and a dirty kitchen and I hate me a dirty kitchen. I don't care really how messy my room is. I'm never in there, and if I am, my eyes are closed!
Anyway, I was cleaning away and Josh and Kaius were playing in the other room. Somehow, I got hit in the head with a football...which I was fine with...just asked them to please leave me alone for a while. 2 seconds later, Kaius was into the dishwasher, pulling out a knife or something. AHHHHHHH!!! I'm so sick and tired of having a Tasmanian devil following me wherever I go and undoing everything I clean!!!!!!! I couldnt handle it anymore. I just said "I can't do this anymore!" and burst into tears.
"I'm the worst stay-at-home-mom, ever!!"
I could tell Josh found it comical because, well, it came out of NOWHERE. I went and just shut myself in the bathroom and had a good cry.
Then we talked, and Josh and Kaius gave me hugs. It was cute, Kaius was so concerned. He really is a sweet boy, but man, today I probably put him in time out 30+ times. He will not stay off my dining room table.
We just came to terms with the fact that, it will be a very long time before our house is clean again consistently. its impossible. I always told myself I wouldnt let my house go and schtuff but its not practical, at all.
I mean, I can keep my kitchen clean, and our rooms since we aren't ever in there, but Kai's favorite time to play with toys is when they're all cleaned up. So aggravating.

I've been reading the "seriously so blessed" blog, have you heard of it? Its someone posing as a mormon mommy and totally making fun of the culture. Love it. It makes me laugh at it and sort of realize its ok to not be perfect and not always be put together...even tho that is ALWAYS how I have pictured myself being (or acting like it)
But I'm just going to say it:
I'm not put together!!! And I like it that way!!!!!!!!
I don't shop at anthropologie, although I'd love to, I'm just way too cheap to do that! And if you know me, you know I'm CHEAP!
I don't shower every day!
I havent folded/hung up laundry in a month!
Every day I sit on my bootay on the couch most of the time!
I think I've eaten somewhere between 8-10 cookies today!

The last 2 years I've been pregnant or breastfeeding multiple times a night. I don't remember what its like to not be tired all the time. But once both kids are sleeping through the night, I'll be an energetic, fun mom, right? I'll shower every morning and put on makeup?
P.S....my belly button is totally gunna pop out this time...and it wasnt even CLOSE to popping out last time. Weird, right?!

*stroking the computer screen* ohhh, Audi. I miss you so much.

Memory Preservation

2011-01-23T14:30:00.000-08:00

I have to remember this.

Today at church, during the opening song, Josh stops singing and exclaims, "Oh! I'm so excited! I just remembered the playoffs are today!!"
Well, saying that to someone who hates watching football on TV constantly (I'm burnt out, f'reals), it made me the opposite of excited. Kaius was in the row behind us sitting with a nice family in our ward. Kaius usually lasts about 2 minutes in Sacrament meeting before he starts melting down, so we were well aware of him.

Time for the good part of the story.

At the end of the opening prayer, after the prayer giver says "amen." I say "amen" and Josh says "cool" and immediately reaches back for Kaius.
Wait... "Did you just say 'cool' instead of 'amen'?"

Oh we had a good laugh.

Random List

2011-01-10T18:45:00.000-08:00

I decided to do another one of these lists, since lots has changed since last time!

1. I'm pretty obsessed with cereal right now, mainly frosted shredded wheat. So far, Kroger brand is the best (better than Frosted Mini Wheats Brand)
2. I have a phobia or something of people touching my belly button. I don't even really like touching it. So, I clean fast.
3. Kaius is obsessed with his own belly button, plays with it when he is winding down. So naturally, he is obsessed with my belly button. Drives me crazeh!
4. Kaius has started to sneeze like Josh. Its like: "AAAH-CHOO. AAAAH" they just kind of yell afterward. Its cute.
5. Today my land lady said there would be someone by to look at the apartment to see if they want to move it. I spent literally ALL day bustin my butt and this place is immaculate. I even took off the magnets on the fridge. And they didn't show.
She should pay for a prenatal massage.
6. The last few weeks I got really into the Babycenter.com message boards. I thought it might be fun, and that I could make a lot of mom friends. nnnope. Most the women there are the biggest brats with no lives and say the rudest things because they are anonymous. So I stopped a few days ago.
7. I'm torn on how to decorate the baby girl's room. red and black to go with the giant high heel chair I have? hot pinks, and marigolds to go with the amazing quilt my sister made me? Or watermelon, because I love hot pinks and watermelon.
8. I kind of cant imagine how life will be with 2 kids. It kind of doesn't feel real to me yet. I don't know why....She is moving ALL THE TIME in there. I swear she never sleeps. Oh I better not have a cat-napper on my hands.
9. For about a month now, I've been feeling really uncomfortable. Like 9 months pregnant uncomfortable. Did you know, when pregnant, the chemical "relaxin" is released into your system to help loosen the birth canal so the baby can fit? This "relaxin" also loosens ligaments and can make you a little less coordinated. I'm finding this as I go to Zumba. I can't work it like I used to! Also, there is a joint called "symphysis pubis" and you can actually injure it. And the lady at my birthing class said once its pulled, it's pulled forever. Meaning every time you are pregnant you will feel the pain of it. I think I may have pulled that last time. (Have I blogged about this before? I think I have.)
10. So in conclusion to #9, I am going to be pregnant forever, again.
11. I haven't gotten mad at all this time, when people say I'm unusually big. I usually say it before they can! But last time it irked me so....so bad. I'm sure it had something to do with not feeling sexy at all, not working out, and watching the pounds roll in.
12. The other day Josh said "You look weird this time pregnant." (He pronounces pregnant "praig-nant". funny)
I asked why...scared for the answer.
"Because you are like skinny everywhere and then you just have this baby bump out of nowhere."
Oh, he scored major points.
13. I've only taken one belly pic so far this time. Just cuz I rarely look cute these days. And before I would have Josh snap a pic of me before we went somewhere. Now as we're going out the door I'm more concerned about having extra diapers and a full sippy of milk for Kaius.
14. No stranger has ever randomly touched my belly. I like it when friends/family do it. But I guess I give off a "touch-me-and-I'll-drop-kick-you" vibe.
15. I didn't get around to posting about Christmas this year, but go to my sis' blog here to read all about it. And to see the pic of us in our footie pajamas my mom got us. I didn't change out of them for like 2 weeks straight. Don't hate.
16. Dear Football,
Die.
Thanks.
17. Cammie got me Biolage shampoo/cond. for Christmas. My hair smells like....heaven.
18. I'm so happy to see success my friends are having with getting pregnant. I still pray for all of my friends that are trying to conceive, every night. So they better try to conceive, every night. (ha ha....kidding.)
20. I have no idea what to do in April...VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) or a repeat c-section. I know that everyone is different. But, I saw this girl on "a baby story" that had opted for a c-section with her 2nd baby, because with her 1st she had a 4th degree tear. yyyyyowza! She said she couldnt even take care of the baby for weeks. And I don't think I know any women who haven't torn. I don't want to go through the pain of recovering from a tear. And I have found women are split 50/50 on whether recovering from a tear or episiotomy is better. I think I'm leaning toward a c-section. I'm not as scared of that option. I'm terrified to have the same thing happen again. Push for 2 hours and then have a c-section. The recovery of c/s is way worse if you go through a buncha labor before. Or so I hear (I have nothing to compare it to). So subsequent c-sections recover better. Every time I go into the doctors office they talk to me about the 2 options for like 45 min each time. It must say on my chart that I'm undecided. Well, put on my chart that I'm undecided til APRIL. Sheesh.
21. Totally cravin sweets this time. But, I've been really good and haven't done ANY baking at all. I think I've made cookies like once in 6 months. Pat on the back!!

Alright. I think that's good. I'm gunna go toss and turn all night while my "round ligament pain" makes it impossible to get comfortable. I dread nighttime! So glad my pelvis hasn't started popping everytime I turn over yet.

Photo by Cammie

2011-01-09T16:04:00.000-08:00

This is Cammie:

She's my Zumba Instructor & BFF. She is a Zumba machine. And she can rock a pair of JEGGINGS! Hello- leg muscles!

I seriously couldn't have lived without her the last 6 months. She does so much for me. Anyways! She took this picture of us:

Don't you think we're kind of awesome? Cuz...I do.

Something That Makes Me Sad

2011-01-08T08:13:00.000-08:00

It doesn't really make me sad that Kaius calls me Daddy. Josh is the best daddy ever. Kaius just runs to him when he gets home...they rough house...its fun. I'm thankful for it.

What does make me sad?

Kaius hits me.

Every day. Multiple times a day.

Not only when he is mad, but when he is playing around. But when he's mad...he hits me square in the glasses.

It hurts SO BAD. I always tear up.

I've tried ignoring him. I've tried calmly telling him "we don't hit, we hug!". I've tried getting in his face a FIRMLY telling him to STOP. HITTING. ME. I don't hit YOU, so YOU don't hit ME.
I've tried immediately putting him in his crib, but I stopped because I don't want him to think I'm punishing him every time he goes in the crib. Like jail, right?
I've made a little time out area that he can't get out of, but lots of the time he does it when we are NOT in the house. Like when Josh is coaching volleyball, and he tries to run onto the court. (that happened last night. OUCH!! my face!!)
I've tried YELLING at him. But I could tell that hurt his feelings. He bawled and I tried soothing him and we cuddled but I don't like how we felt doing that.

He hits and bites other kids. He hits for no reason, but bites if he wants their toy. What the hale do I do in this situation??? I tell him we don't hit, and take him away from the child.

I've tried everything. But if you have any suggestions, I would LOVE to hear them. He has been doing this since he was a year or so. About 4 months.

Sacred Grove Rolling Pin

2010-12-30T17:51:00.000-08:00

My Grandparents returned from their mission in Palmyra, NY about a month ago. They were in charge of tending the grounds of the Sacred Grove, where Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith as a 14 year old boy.

There was a tree in the Sacred Grove that they were considering chopping down. The decision was made to not cut it down. The day that decision was made, that very tree was struck by lightening.
Decision made for them!
My Grandpa decided to make out of that tree, rolling pins for each of his daughters, and granddaughters for Christmas. (He also got some wood from the Hill Cumorah, but my specific rolling pin is from the Sacred Grove)
They are beautiful.

Grandma said we have to make pies with it :)
I've never made a dessert pie before (because I don't like them very much)
But I made chicken pot pie!!!

Its in the oven right now and I'm hungry!!!

Don't I look cute in that picture? Yes, I put a bra on just for that.

You're welcome.

Edited to Add: My table has a lot of flaws, but its clean. Promise. I bleached the tabletop, then rinsed with water thoroughly. Just in case it looks grody to you.

Tis' the Season

2010-12-17T12:31:00.000-08:00

For everything to break.
Josh got laid off.
Our flatscreen TV broke.
Que the computer cord to break (for the 5th time).
Que camera to break.

But we got through it! It actually wasn't too tough. Because we have awesome friends and family to our aid. Random ward members would bring by food, friends would watch Kaius for dr. appointments and such, (and my mom doing both of those things) It would have been hard without the help, for sure.

Josh got a new job, as an IT recruiter. So if you know someone in the IT field (or something similar) and they are looking for a job, hit up Josh (or me) and he'll see what he can find for ya. He is loving it so far. He just cant stop talking about how excited he is about life now. He doesn't dread going to work anymore.

Kaius is as cute as ever. He now says Daddy & (if prompted enough) Mobbie (Mommy), ball, ruff ruff, whats that?, pssssss (please), and he has said once or twice "shoe" and "dider" (diaper). He mostly signs though. I was working with him for months it seemed on signing, and he wasnt ever interested until recently. He signs "more", "all done", "please", "thank you" & "I want to brush my teeth".
You don't mess with that boys' tooth brush. He brushes religiously twice a day and would do it for hours if I let him.
He has been hitting a lot lately. I guess thats normal for his age. Its quite embarassing when he does it somewhere in public. I feel so bad and don't know what to do. I just keep telling him NO, we don't hit. So hopefully it will catch on.
He LOVES balls, and is very good at throwing and is getting a lot better at catching. Yesterday when we got home from his dr appt, Kaius was looking at the book the doc gave him (yes, he gets a book at every appointment!) And it was a book of colors and for brown it was a football. Kaius pointed at the picture, and then pointed at the football across the room and squealed. Then I showed him he had a football on his shirt and he was so stoked.

Honestly, I kind of think he knows whats going on with the new baby coming. He pays so much attention to my belly. He kisses my belly a lot too. We talk about there being a baby in my belly all the time. He loves to rub and pat it. He has been a lot more cuddly lately too. He loves babies, so I'm excited to see how he reacts.

Speaking of new baby, we found out what we're having! Josh started his new job the day of the ultrasound, so I invited my girl Cammie to come with me.

and we found it is a

GIRL!

Names for a girl will be easier for Josh and I, I think. Anyway, in the ultrasound she kept her legs closed for about 20 seconds and then she spread them and I shouted "GIRL!!" and the ultrasound tech said, "yep!"
We are excited for her arrival in April. Everything in the pregnancy has been going well. I am so blessed. Craving everything sweet.
A yummy treat I found was to make sandwiches with graham crackers and cool whip, then store in the freezer and wa-la! tastes like an ice cream sandwich but very little calories. Which is good for me because I've been craving ice cream a lot.

I am really excited for Christmas. To spend time with family and for Kaius to play with his cousins.

Oh, and we took Kaius to see santa while we were in california. He kept his distance, but Santa was nice and gave him a bell. Much much better than a candy cane. He was definitely interested in the jolly old man, but not enough to go sit on the mans lap. I freaked out when I was little when santa came to my house (some ward members brought us by presents, dressed as santa and elves) and its...a strange man, with a bunch of white fluffy stuff all over his face. Screamin' red weird clothes. We'll see how he thinks of him next year.

Black Friday

2010-11-18T21:30:00.000-08:00

Are there any black friday guru's out there??

What are the good deals? I mean, we aren't really looking for TV's or laptops. Are there deals on things like diapers?

Where is the best place to go? Do some stores have storewide deals, like 40% off most everything? I'm mostly interested in Toys R US and Babies R US. But can't really find much info online. Anyone know what their deals were like in past years?

A Gem

2010-11-17T17:15:00.000-08:00

Update of the Brecks

2010-11-16T21:41:00.000-08:00

For about 6 months a lot of people have been saying things about Kaius like "Wow your hair is long!" or "He needs a haircut!"
But I was trying to go for the surfer boy look! However, his hair is too thin or something. He isn't old enough for the look I dont think.

But cutting his hair short was like cutting away his baby curls, and I wanted to hang on to my baby. It was very sad for me.
But he looks cute.

Josh is responsible for how good it looks, since he is good at cutting his own hair.

Also, Josh received a job offer today for a company he really wanted to work for. Its about an hour away so we will have to move.
We have experienced Josh having to commute an hour each way before, and it was pure hell for both of us. Way to expensive on gas and wear n tear on the car. Killed our Lexus. Me dealing with a new baby and Josh being away 12 hours of the day...not cool. I know that he is not meant to have a job that keeps him away from his family. I will go crazy.
My friend let me borrow her book "The 5 Love Languages" and my love language is quality time. PLUS, dealing with construction on the freeway and UTAH drivers, is enough to put someone over the edge.

We are so blessed to have found this opportunity. We are sad to leave our ward here. I am sad to leave my girl Cammie. However...Josh will be coaching volleyball up here and so every Tuesday and Thursday I can probably still go ZUMBAAAAAA!
Im not gunna say its been awesome having Josh home the last month and a half. He has locked himself in our room 8 hours of the day every day with the computer looking for a job. I guess it has paid off! But it was kind of like he wasn't here. Except when Kaius had a poopy diaper, he has changed 93% of all the diapers. It's been GREAT.

my whole house is GREAT

2010-11-10T14:39:00.000-08:00

Have you ever seen "Jessica's Daily Affirmation" video? If not, here it is.

I have had a couple people tell me that the little girl reminds them of me. What a compliment!
Cuz I do think I'm quite awesome. I was just born that way ;)

Well, I'm gunna just copy her in this post. Last night, Josh and I were brushing our teeth and I was telling him that because of parent-teacher conferences I don't have scouts today. Only when I was telling him, I was doin a JIG, I was so excited. He was like are you trying to be that Jessica girl? So I hopped up on the bathroom sink and did a little rendition for him, haha.

anyway, here goes.

I like my son!

I like my husband!

I like my dad!

I like my sisters!

I like my in laws!

I like my mom!

I like my brothers!

I like my ward!

I like my baby bump! And the baby! And the kicks!

I like my stuff!

I like my hair!

I like my haircuts! (which I cut and colored myself..I'm quite the recessionista)
Here is my only pic of it...its in Leia buns but you can see the bangs I cut and the color

I like my friends!

I can do anything good...yeah...yeah yeah.

Bad Advertising

2010-10-24T21:17:00.001-07:00

Are these people really pro's? Did they even go to college?

You all know how I feel about Sara Lee advertising. I don't wanna watch people stuff their face/crumbs all over their face. sick. I don't want to eat anything now.

But here's another company that's gone way way WAY too far:

CHARMIN.
pieces left behind?? um, shut up.

Yes, yes I WOULD like to go a day without watching a bear take a squat every day on TV.

(Now would be a bad time to say, we use charmin. Its the softest and Josh is a TP snob. It would be the cheapest stuff, if it were up to me. Ya happy, Charmin? You just got the best advertisment, for free.)

Next up, General Mills Check Mark Dog Grooming commercial

Her hand gets a lot closer to her dogs....beeeehind.
Josh informed me that its normal for people to show their dogs that way at a dog show.
You know what I say to that?
I. Don't. Care.
Seeing a woman rub her dog's butt doesn't make me want to go eat cereal. Let alone General Mills.

Want to know my opinion on who DOES advertise well?

aaand for some reason I cant find any pictures from a few years back when they had lots of desserts like ice cream, cup cakes in place of diet dr. pepper...

Anyway, I'm not crazy about Dr. Pepper, but that picture makes me want to take a drink of that drink. They just show the product when it is in best form, with ice and the cool condensation running down the glass...

I think basically I don't like advertisements with people in them.

Kaius Turned One!!!!!!

2010-10-20T21:48:00.000-07:00

This is super late, but we're lucky we even got any pictures at all, methinks. I had morning sickness and didn't do much of anything around that time.
Well, cake eating was anti-climactic.
He reached for the whole cake at first...thinking we would totally stop him.

But when we didn't stop him, he was just so upset that his hands were dirty.

All he wanted to do was cuddle his daddy to make him feel better.

Then, mommy took him on the grass to give mauling the cake another try.

Same thing, not happy.

Just wanted to cuddle.
But I didn't mind :)

Stats:
This chunker, being in the 90th percentile for both height and weight most of his life...was only 20th percentile at his 12 month appt. He stayed 20 lbs for like 5 months straight. He's just lengthening out now. His chubbiness is disappearing and as soon as i see pics like this one, its crazy how much is gone.

Updates:

Every day he's understanding more and more what we're saying to him. If we ask him to give us something he doesn't want to give up, he shakes his head from side to side.

He points at object and says "whats that??!" but it is pronounced "whathhhaaaaa?"

When I say "ready, set" he says "doow"

He has 7 teeth with one more on the way...yippieee.

When he sees someone he knows he says "Hi" to them, about 4-5 times. so cute.

If he hears any kind of music at all, he is bouncing up and down and waving his arms. He loves any and all music. Heavy metal, hip hop, classical...

I'm starting to try to potty train him. It would be awesome to have him out of diapers at 18 months when this baby comes (hey, supposedly Josh did it at that age! And Kaius is just a little CARBON COPY of Josh)

He loves kissing a hugging his stuffed animals. He has about 10-15 of them but I think his favorite is a big super soft Froggy that Katie got him at my shower. He loves kissing and hugging mommy and daddy too. A few weeks ago at church one of his little friends his age, Kellan, was playing with him and Kaius just leaned in and gave him a hug. Kellan's reaction was so funny, like "Uh...I like hugs but not from a DUDE" it was really funny. His mom Rachel and I are partners as Den mothers for the Bears. and they were both sitting in their strollers, side by side, holding hands. Now that I am typing it out it sounds a little weird, but at the time it was really cute. Anyway! He went in to kiss my mom a few weeks ago (sometimes they're opened mouthed, haha) and she thought he was going to bite her chin. But all he wanted was some grandma loves :)

He has been walking really well the last couple of weeks, getting pretty fast now and is almost running!

I can't think of anything else right now, but I would just like to state on record that I think this here baby on the way is a girl. The pregnancy has just been different. Im still kinda sick if I dont eat and that didn't happen with Kaius.

Epic Deer Watcher

2010-10-18T21:18:00.000-07:00

We went to Steamboat Springs, CO for a getaway with some friends (which was amazing, and deserves its own post) and we were driving back this morning at 6 am. It was still dark and Josh was on full deer patrol. He is pretty amazing at pointing them out, I even informed the couple that was riding with us. Well, it was the girls and Kaius in the back (and we were all asleep), and the boys in the front chatting. We were going 70 and came up over a hill...to find THIS waiting for us.

But, pretend they are lined up across the highway, not grass.
No Joke, there were this many.
And as soon as humanly possible, Josh had the brake pedal to the floor and the tires screeeeeeeeched against the pavement, which immediately got the deers' attention (and the backseat passengers). They all started to dart right, except the one on the far left. He darted left. Which gave us a tiny gap, that I was sure our car wouldn't fit through. Josh swerved last second and made the teeny gap (which was probably on the opposite direction of traffic, luckily there were no cars) And as soon as we were in the clear, we all broke out the praises.
"That was AMAZING, Josh!"
"Wow, good job, Josh, I wouldn't have known what to do. I would have gone straight into them."
"me too. How did you do that???"
"Good thing we said a prayer before we left"
"Dude, that was like, video game good."
"Josh, I am thoroughly impressed. that was the most amazing thing I've ever witnessed."

You get the idea. He's irreplaceable.

Kaius' Current Obsession

2010-10-10T13:17:00.000-07:00

This iPad commercial.

On time he was sleeping on Josh's lap and this commercial came on and he immediately shot up (eyes still closed) and started dancing, swaying back and forth. Josh started laughing really hard, cuz it was hilarious, and Kaius slowly opened his eyes. After the commercial was over he went back to sleep.
I finally found it on youtube because I couldnt remember if it was ipod, ipad, droid, whatever. Its been on repeat for a while...and he's not getting sick of it yet.

Giving Birth Analogy

2010-10-08T15:23:00.000-07:00

Pregnancy...you pee on the stick, you find out the gender. Its all so exciting. The weeks tick by...and you know when you get to around 40 weeks...in order to get your baby, you're gunna have to go down a dark alley

and meet a big scary guy and he is going to punch you in the face. You don't want to get punched in the face, but it just has to happen to get the baby out.

Just because this is my second child, and I have experienced pushing for 2 hours, and a c-section once, doesn't mean that when it happens again with this next baby that its less scary. I still have to go meet the man, and he's still gunna have to punch me in the face.

I think I'm actually more scared this time around, cuz my uterus has been cut open before! The risks! VBAC or another C-section? Im not even deciding until the end. But either way will leave a mark! ah!

Addicted to Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers

2010-10-07T13:25:00.000-07:00

For about 2 weeks I have been feeling the baby move around. But within the last few days, he/she has been poking out of my belly!
According to the internet, the baby is only about 3 inches long, so it must be the whole body sticking out! It happens when I go to Zumba and when I lay down to sleep at night. Today I am 13 weeks. That's crazy early to be feeling what I am, right? I know you can feel the baby earlier and earlier with each pregnancy, but first time I felt Kaius move, I was 17 weeks!

That's pretty much all I have to report. My morning sickness was done at 12 weeks, so I had to have my girl Cammie & her husband Malan over for the famous p-dub steak sandwiches. I can cook again!!!

:(

2010-09-29T21:49:00.000-07:00

I went through my blog archives to see when the exact date my morning sickness was over last time. But I guess I didnt document that well enough. cuz I wrote "i dont know if my morning sickness is over today, cuz i have a bad migrane"

I haven't had a clean house in over 2 months. I have cooked maybe three meals in that two months. I've changed our bedsheets ONCE in the last 2 months. I usually do it once a week.

I've only been out of the house a few times (other than going to Zumba...which is pretty hard to get my lazy A to anyway)

That means I dont take Kaius anywhere or do anything fun. We play together in the living room but i would like to take him to the park and things.

I don't know how many times I've stopped at Arby's for curly fries. I dont know how many Wendy's stops I've made. Before this I rarely ate out.

On a more positive note:
No more BREASTFEEDING!!!! yahoo!!!!

(-side note-ya know those women who are super sad about stopping, cuz they are emotionally attached and will miss it? yeah, not one of those women. For me, it was the most healthy thing and it was free. I did it until it was recommended, which I guess is longer than most make it)

I quit about a month ago. Kaius began to like whole milk more and more, so I went down to twice a day, and then once a day, and the zero times a day.
Ever since then, he's sleeping through the night. and, AND he is cuddling with me way way way way more now. today he cuddled with me for like an hour on the couch. I loved it.

He knows how to kiss now (its still open mouthed but he totally leans in and has a sweet look on his face) and responds to a lot of things I say.
If I ask him to, he will point to his belly, his teeth/mouth, and sometimes he can get his nose. Every time I ask where his bum bum is, he says "bum bum bum..." And we are working on colors too.
Oh and if he wakes up in the middle of the night, Josh gets up with him. Its great. But i dont think i can physically get up.

Best Invention Ever

2010-09-25T11:50:00.000-07:00

A girl in my babycenter group told me about these...

GUMMY PRENATAL VITAMINS.

I was skeptical at first, thinking they must be gross.

Well, I figured they are worth a shot, since I absolutely DREAD taking the pills. Everyone dreads taking them. They taste like garbage and the taste is left in your mouth. And every once in a while when you throw it up...you're traumatized and never want to take them again.
I will admit, I have skipped days because I would just put it off.

Well, these gummies are SO good. They are super soft and tasty. A bit pricey, but a lot worth it. They don't have iron in them though. But I'm not worried about it.
If you are pregnant or thinking about getting pregnant, you gotta get these! They are sold at Target and Costco. $11 for 90 gummies, and you take 2 a day. So each bottle will last 45 days.

Josh tried one and keeps trying to sneak them!

our AMAZING news

2010-09-20T14:56:00.000-07:00

So I've been worried for the last week that I might be having a miscarriage. I'm 10 weeks along. So I called the dr. and they had me come in to check my HCG levels. Then 48 hours check them again, to make sure they double. They said they would call me Monday morning with the results.

This morning at 11:45 I still hadn't heard from them, so I called them. They said they had the results but hadn't had the chance to review them yet, so they'll get back to me. An hour later they called.
"I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but your HCG levels were supposed to double, and they went down 20,000. You are most likely having a miscarriage. We will have you come in tomorrow to determine whether you will need to take medication or have a D & C to avoid an infection in your uterus."

"is there a chance I'm not having a miscarriage?" I ask through tears.

"At this point, its not likely," She states regretfully, "I'm so sorry I just don't want to give you any false hope."

I say goodbye through sobs and hang up the phone.

I immediately text my friends and family members who have been supporting me through this to let them know the bad news. I'm crying right now because I remember so well the pure grief I was going through.
I pulled myself together to call my sweet husband. But the sobbing continued and he said he would come right home to be with me.

I was thinking, 'This is not how it was supposed to be. Kaius was supposed to have a sibling close in age. that was our plan. For the last 2 months I've done nothing but sit on the couch and watch TV. My house is a pig sty. I haven't cooked in 2 months. Josh has done so much to take care of me and Kaius. Feeding us. Getting me food when I need/want it. Giving me massages whenever I want.
Did all of that go to waste? Is this my fault? Do I not take very good care of myself? It is all my fault.'

It was about at that point when I got another call from the dr's assistant, "I forgot to tell you why there is a chance why it may not be a miscarriage."
(oh REALLY? You also forgot to tell me there was a chance at all.)
"You're just over 10 weeks right?"
yes...
"Well its about at that point that your HCG levels off and evens out and can decrease..."
Thats basically it, I'll spare you the other intimate details.
I looked online a little bit and basically it said HCG levels aren't always accurate to tell you whether your pregnancy is viable or not. Everyone is different. Not everyone doubles every 48 hours.

After I read that, I told Josh "That makes me a little bit mad. I don't think I had a miscarriage! I think they will find a heartbeat."
He said he hopes they do too.

Before the appointment I was unusually chipper. I wasn't worried about it.
After about 3 minutes of her looking for the heartbeat with the doppler (and hearing my slow heartbeat a few times), she decided to go a little bit higher and *swoosh*swoosh*swoosh* went that baby's heartbeat. Tears filled my eyes and I don't remember a time feeling as much joy (yes I do, when I heard Kai's heartbeat the first time...and his first cry)
She said "You must be further along than we thought!! The baby is pretty high!"
We were so excited she turned on the ultrasound machine and she showed Josh and I the little tiny flutter of the heart.

Thank you to those of you who knew about it for your prayers and support. It would have been hard without you guys.
She told me when we were leaving that now that everything is ok after all that happened, the chances of me miscarrying are less than 3%. Super stoked! Baby #2 is on the way!!!!!

Weird

2010-09-12T22:30:00.000-07:00

On MSN.com when I logged out of Hotmail, it showed a story about why educators are separating best friends in class and why its a good thing. The picture to go along with the article was this:

I did a double take at the girl on the left.

Doesn't she look like....me?

photoshop fail

2010-09-07T19:24:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen a worse airbrushing job? When I saw it, I was like...it looks airbrushed but maybe she lost weight. I watched a few minutes of the show today, uh, no. She is not that skinny.
Now that I look at it again I see how horrible of a job the did photoshopping her.

Im all about curves, lets be reasonable though, ABC.

The Bob Sagat Dream

2010-09-02T20:44:00.000-07:00

So...the other night I had a dream that Josh didn't exist and I wasn't married. Its like every other night I'll have a dream that way, and then every night in between Kaius and Josh are there.

Well, I remember considering in my dream whether I should marry Bob Sagat, because we were dating and I guess you could say things were gettin' pretty serious (kip from napoleon dynamite accent).

Well, laying in bed last night I vented to Josh: "I'm really concerned!! Why would I dream that? He was a better looking Bob Sagat though."

Josh knew right away what the reason was.

Our guilty pleasure, is watching this absolutely ridiculous TV show about teenagers that have "S" and get pregnant a lot, and are ALL SUPER UNREALISTICALLY open about talking about "S" with their parents...Do you watch it too?

Anyway...

Here is one of the characters:

I thought they were related, but no. For the record, I don't think either of these men are attractive, but Ben (the top one) is better looking. Which is more of who the person in my dream looked like. I remember when I was considering marriage I was like "i'd be famous...but im REALLY not attracted to him" and I was completely torn.

My Poor Baby!

2010-08-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

So, I always thought people were over-exaggerating when they say they were up with their sick baby all night. Kaius hasn't really ever been sick before. He had a temperature of 101 all day yesterday, which isn't really anything to call the doc over, especially with no other symptoms. He just wanted me to hold him all day and sleep on me all day, which I didn't mind too much. Except the only thing I wanted to eat was ramen and its quite impossible to make that with a baby in your arms, so I had to wait for Josh to get home.

When "nye nye" time came, Kaius was waking up every 30 minutes, leaving me no time to get a wink in. Around 1 am he was absolutely inconsolable and felt super hot, so I woke josh up to have him help me take his temp. It was
103°

Which alarmed both of us. So I quickly got on the computer (after giving him some infant tylenol) to see if I need to take him in to the doctors.
Baby Center said the doctor will ask about other symptoms, which he didnt have any, and if he has none to just give him meds and watch him. After the meds he seemed fine but was wiiiide awake. I stayed up for another hour or so but he would cry if I sat. I was soooo tired I finally went into Josh and woke him up again saying I needed a break or I was going to go mad!
I couldn't have left him in his crib to cry it out when he is sick. That's just wrong.
I laid my head down and I was out.
He woke up about every hour after that.

This morning we got a call from Audi that our car is fixed. So Josh wakes me up at 8 am to go get it. I don't know how he did that successfully without me hurting him ;)

Well, I am obviously a basket case, so of course I forget my phone, and my house keys. So when Kaius and I come back to the house, we have no way of calling Josh or getting in. So we made today an adventure!
We went to a bookstore, Kaius was as happy as can be playing with books, toys, and other kids. There was a little girl there that said "babies can't be in bookstores." It was really funny. I got to finish "The Second Short Life of Bree Tanner"

Then we went to the bishop's house to use their phone to call Josh. Our bishop and his family are awesome. Then Kaius and I were hungry...sick of living off of cheerio's for the day. So we went to Smiths and got cookie samples! And spent a good chunk of time in the coffee aisle...oh man coffee smells soooo freakin good.

(but tastes gross...except frappuccinos and coffee ice cream...which I don't consume anymore..I'm mormon)
Then Josh saved the day with a pizza and a key to the house.

It was actually a really fun day. Thank goodness Kaius did enough crying last night for a month.

Some things I want to remember about Kaius:

-He is OBSESSED with dogs. He thinks the bark is so funny. He is always giggling when he sees them in real life, tv, or books.

-He is also pretty obsessed with feet/shoes. He got a hold of this baby girl shoe and put it to his ear like it was a phone.

-He takes anything and puts it to his ear since then and pretends its a phone...even if its an envelope and not shaped like a phone at all. He just babbles like he is having an important conversation.

-Today he learned "UH OOOOH"

-He says "mama" but says "dada" waaay more often. He'll just go around the house going "dad. dad. dad. dad. dad." and he says "Hi dad"

-He LOVES any type of ball and loves to throw them.

-About 30 seconds ago Josh offered him some pizza and he walked about 13 steps to him without falling!!! Nuts!

Kaius learning his Animal Sounds

2010-08-14T15:38:00.000-07:00

This sweet duck pond and creek are right by our house!

I'm SO ECSTATIC...

2010-08-03T20:08:00.000-07:00

I could cry. I got teary eyed.

On the way home from Zumba (so, the endorphins were already flowin..feelin good) tonight, I heard a radio advertisement. It was about PURPLE crying.

P.U.R.P.L.E. stands for:
Peak of Crying
Unexpected
Resists Soothing
Pain-like Face
Long Lasting
Evening

ever since I got pregnant/had a baby, it seems I hear about a parent/babysitter killing a baby at least once a week. It breaks my heart. I've been there, only a few times, where Kaius cries and cries and cries. Wont eat, Clean bum, Wont sleep. One time I was overwhelmed and started crying...right when the relief society presidency decided to pop in unexpectedly. I just love looking like I haven't showered/slept in weeks, not wearing a bra, and am blubbering like an idiot.
Anyway, I see advertisements for no drunk/drowsy driving, help with quitting tobacco, immunize your children, etc, etc.
I thought, "Why aren't they doing advertisements for not shaking your baby? Sometimes after trying EVERYTHING its ok to place them in their crib and walk away to gather yourself together." I wished they would make billboards. But I just didn't know who to contact about it.

Looks like someone took initiative. Bless their heart.

Things I Learned This Weekend

2010-08-02T13:24:00.001-07:00

1. Krazy glue will kill your blackberry. So...no krazy glue using while Kaius is awake.

2. Krazy glue will also not come out of your couch.

3. Krazy glue does not come off skin easily, and sometimes gets caught on your clothes and it huuuurts.

4. No krazy glue when Kaius is awake (somehow not a drop made it on Kaius)

5. Fried plantains with salt and garlic are sooo yummy. Reminds me of a french fry with a hint of sweetness, but way way easier to make.

6. Somehow i fell deeper in love with my husband.

Thats it.

My Husband Thinks I'm Crazy

2010-07-30T00:50:00.000-07:00

Getting ready to put Kaius down for the night tonight, ya know, getting myself situated to feed him. Josh says "Shouldn't you be done with that?"
"Done with what..breastfeeding?!" I am shocked, Josh is usually very supportive with all things baby. He helped take care of young siblings growing up.
He nods. "You are gunna still breastfeed him with all those TEETH?"
We just noticed Kai's top 2 teeth are coming in, so paired with the 2 bottom teeth, if he ever bites me he can actually draw blood. yay! But they usually learn how NOT to hurt you.
"Yes...I'll probably b/f him....until our next baby"
He gives me this "you're nuts" look and raises his eyebrows.
So I ask "What, you don't think thats a good ide-" "No." He interrupts me with.

Oh man I laughed pretty hard. Guess you had to be there.

Reflecting

2010-07-22T01:28:00.000-07:00

I wish I didn't worry about life so much. I usually really don't. I'm frugal. I don't worry about extra stuff in life, such as getting my nails done, or going out to dinner. I can cook just as good as they can, for much cheaper. I like to think of myself as industrious...no thats not the right word...Frugal is really just it. I think its one of my most valuable qualities.
Lately I've been letting myself stress a little bit. Car trouble, losing a $10 at the grocery store, more car trouble, and more car trouble.

I havent looked at these pictures in a while

And this one, gave me butterflies.

And this one...reminded me of how well I am taken care of. Josh takes such good care of me and Kaius. Heavenly Father has taken care of us as well. Our needs are met and....that's all we need.

It also reminds me of all the times Josh would wait on me hand and foot when I was pregnant. Cafe Rio? coming right up. Back rub? right after I finish this song on guitar hero ;)

And those long hours before we both heard Kaius cry for the first time. He was so loving, caring, & attentive. We made a great team.

It was good for me to see these pictures. Refreshing.

Make sure the person you love knows how you feel. Today.

What I am Grateful for

2010-07-15T00:13:00.001-07:00

I just wanna start out by saying ever since I did that post about removing captcha's so its easier to leave a comment, cuz i've never gotten spam comments....well, I have gotten 3 since then. Stupid spammers tryin to make me look stupid.

1. I am grateful for the time on this Earth I was born.
I don't have to wash my clothes on a washboard (aka, Josh's stomach) and dry them outside on a line with clothespins. I can take a warm shower every day if I want, and I don't have to make the water warm myself.
If I want to talk to a friend I can call, send a text, or facebook, instead of send a telegram and wait 6 months to hear back (or somethin)

2. I am grateful I was born into such a modern society.
I wasn't born to some African tribe in the middle of nowhere speaking a tongue click language. I live in a place where I can go to college if I want, go to the doctor if I'm sick..etc.

3. I am grateful to be born into an LDS family.
I grew up knowing what happens when we die, and our ultimate goal in life is to keep the commandments so that we can live with Heavenly Father in the Celestial Kingdom. Our cars, diamond wedding ring, shoes, designer handbags, and private jets are not coming with us to heaven. We will only take with us our knowledge and our families if we are sealed to them.

4. I am grateful to have a happy marriage.
Josh and I decided to tie the knot after only dating for a month, but while "courting" we spent a lot of sleepless nights just talking. We prayed about it and knew it was right. Josh is such a great husband and he does so much for me. But I am a lucky girl. Sometimes it doesn't always go as planned for everyone.

5. I am grateful that I have a warm bed (or cool bed) to sleep in every night.
I know I take for granted all the time what I have. Any day we could have a earthquake and lose everything. I remember one day growing up the hot water heater wasnt working and I had to take a cold shower. You don't realize how great something is until you go without it.

6. I am grateful for the chance I have to be a mother at this stage of my life.
I have quite a few close friends who aren't able to have children right away. I have no idea what to say to them. I try to empathize but sound like a complete moron. I wish the adoption process wasn't so rough. I want so bad for them to experience motherhood. I have every confidence they will someday. I pray for them lots and lots.
I probably sounded moron-ish during that last paragraph. I don't think I know how to express how I feel about it accurately, or something. My heart breaks for them but I don't know what to say.

Check THIS out

2010-07-11T21:26:00.000-07:00

Josh in his college days....Halloween '05. So I had just graduated high school. And hadn't met him yet. But I just found this gem in his external hard drive.

ow OW.

Rough Coupl'a Days

2010-07-08T23:46:00.000-07:00

I usually really can't find too much to complain about in my life. I'm super lucky to have such good health in my family, food, cars, a place to live, etc...so maybe at the end of the post I will try to post some things I'm grateful for.

Few days ago after a dentist visit, and the numbness wore off and my mouth started to hurt, I took a few ibuprofen. Next day, I took 2 more because Kaius knocked over our tall lamp

and my nose happened to break its fall. It cracked me out of nowhere, it seemed. I was stunned. As soon as I realized what happened, I couldn't help it...I took it personally. The little guy didn't mean to hurt me, but I started crying and my nose started flowing.

No major damage though, just a bump and a bruise on the ole schnoz. (Kaius doesn't really react at all when I cry, it seems he kind of ignores it)
Well, I guess breastfeeding mothers aren't supposed to take ibuprofen because it zaps their milk supply. That would explain the biting and the nap strikes. This biting business has got to stop. He has teeth now.
I confessed to Josh that sometimes I don't really feel like Kaius likes me. I feel like the only thing I'm good for is getting food, but he would rather do everything with daddy.
Its just been a rough few days. Im sure in a few days I'll be swooning over how cute he is again.

Man oh man is he cute.
The way when he once in a blue moon finds my phone and I give him a surprised "hey!" and he jumps about a mile in the air and drops the phone cuz he knows that's a no-no.
The way he mauls my face sometimes with slobber, I like to think of it as kisses.
I love how expressive he is, and I get told probably once a day that my baby is very expressive, or gives very funny facial expressions. I guess I thought all babies were like that.
I love when he sees a new person or toy or when we go outside, he waves. And I always respond with "Hi (so & so)" or "hi new toy!" or "Hello outdoors!" and join him in waving.
I love when he comes around the corner of the hallway and "scares" me, then goes back around the corner so I can't see him, and then he'll crawl out again (playing peek-a-boo)
I love when he pulls the blanket over his head and after I say "Where's Kaius?" he'll pull the blanket off and giggle.
I love that he will eat any any anything I put in his mouth. tomatoes, onions, pickles, meat, toast, grapes, pineapple you name it.
Oh, well, there was this one time at my sisters I was eating a burrito and I gave him what I thought was a bite with avocado...I could tell from the sudden crying, that it was a jalapeno. Those suck. He was fine as soon as it was out.

I feel better.

wits end.

2010-07-03T13:13:00.000-07:00

Its been good to see family here in California, but this roadtrip has been hell.
We drove to Reno to spend the night there. 5 minutes away and I can see the city and that McDonalds catches up to me. I'll spare you the details, but I kept saying "this is worse than labor contractions!!" over and over. I ordered Josh to run in to the Motel 6 to see if they have a bathroom I can use NOW. Not ASAP, NOW. And if they dont, take me somewhere else. We had already stopped at 2 gas stations, and Kaius would scream til Josh took him out of the carseat...and absolutely melted down when we'd have to strap him back in. I wanted to end the meltdowns.

The guy in front of Josh in line at Motel 6 could tell Josh was in a major hurry because he was pacing and what not...so he let him ahead. He gave the office lady his ID and said "My wife needs to get into a room asap, its an emergency, she is sick." so she looks at her computer a sec (I'm now inside with Kaius...I can't wait any longer. About to leave a mess on their floor.)
and she says "You're not registered here" And Josh is like "Yeah, i know, REGISTER ME. I WANT A ROOM"
Im witnessing this with tears welling up because of the pain, and I'm not sure how much longer I can hold off.
The crabby lady shoves his I.D. back at him and says, "Im taking care of this guy first! He was ahead of you!"
and right as soon as we say "he let us ahead" the stupid guy says "Oh I didnt know that was why you wanted ahead of me, I thought you already had a room"
The crabby office lady keeps chiming in "Go somewhere else!"
Josh is like "MY WIFE IS SICK!! You dont have any compassion on a sick woman??"
"WELL...MY WIFE IS SICK TOO" He replies. I don't think he was lying...he had angry tears welling up so I bet she has cancer or something, but not i-need-a-bathroom-now-or-i-will-shoot-you kind of sick. We saw her chillin in their truck. She was very comfortable.

Josh is like "really? she is sick and cant wait 2 more minutes to get a room?"

and the office lady says "Im calling the police!!!"

wha?? you're calling the police...on us? a cute little mormon couple from Utah? the husband is wearing a BYU shirt and the wife has a baby on her hip crying and you're gunna what?

Josh just told them they were crazy and we walked out.

Next motel we rushed to luckily had no one in line, and she took a whole 2 minutes to register us. I tell you what, if we would have made it into that motel room a HOT MINUTE LATER than we did, I would not have made it.

OK. DAY 2 of Vacation from HELL.

On our way to my dads and the car breaks down in Sacramento. it takes 3 hours to get the car towed and get a rental car. is that a normal timeframe? I dunno, I've never done this sort of thing before.

They called and said it was fixed so Josh went to pick it up this morning, and drop off the rental car. He got a few miles away on the freeway and the car did the same thing, it would stop accelerating, and then wont start. broke down. So he got towed and he is sitting at the dealership.
He was supposed to be back by now and we were going to go see Eclipse.

Kaius wouldnt go down for a nap, just fussing for hours all day and just FINALLY went down for a nap.

I am now rocking in the fetal position in the corner with a bag of oreos i found in my step mom's cabinet and my eye is twitching. Yep, I'm at my wits end.

Kaius

2010-06-22T21:42:00.000-07:00

A few funny stories.
I went to visit my sister a few weeks ago and went to her ward. An older woman sat next to me in Sunday school and started giving Kaius some attention. "Oh your so cute and chubby", she says. And then asks me how old he is, I say 9 months, and she says wow he's a big boy for only a 9 month old! So cute.
about 10-20 seconds pass and she asks me, "He is so cute. How old is he?"
I nod my head and say "9 months" in a manner like, you just asked me that...duh.
But her reply was "oh my goodness, (turns to talk to Kaius) you are so big for a 9 month old! your so cute."
Dimentia? Alzheimers? I dunno but I had a good laugh--inside my head of course.

We went to the store, and every time we check out josh shows them our baby and says
"Where's the barcode for this baby, cuz we'd like to buy him too" and a random fellow consumer just came over and was baby talking to Kaius and started nibbling on his feet! like nom nom nom nom nom. Josh grabbed the cart and slowly pulled it away from her and we awkwardly laughed like heh...heh...get your mouth off my baby... but she followed the cart as it moved and kept on munchin. Then she told us her life story.

Kaius finally cut his first tooth, it seemed it popped up overnight.
About an hour ago Kaius was crawling on the hardwood and he faceplanted it. He started crying and when he cries I know something is wrong. I have such a good baby.
Anyway, Grandma Theresa picked him up and said uh oh...his gums are bleeding.
I picked him up and....couldnt see his tooth. I felt around and now its barely poking through. It got jammed clear down. I am so worried and I don't know how I could handle any worse. I know I'll have to. I just feel like a bad mom.

2010-06-03T13:12:00.000-07:00

(Comment from Sarah)

"A lady brought cookies to an enrichment activity once and after everyone had eaten them she announced she had made them with breastmilk. Dry freaking heave."

Yeah...I'm going to have to agree with you all and say if I consumed a cookie made with someone elses breast milk, I'd flip a table over. My own however, I know where its been. But I wouldn't ever give it to anyone else!!

(comment from my sister Jana)

"I don't know what kind of diet that mother has, or what kind of prescription drugs she takes/ has taken... I mean if she just downed a king sized bag of cheetos, then went and got herself all sweaty outside and then pumped some milk into my cookies, I'm going to be a little more than grossed out."

Agreed. Ew!

What does Kaius mean?

2010-06-03T10:24:00.000-07:00

When I was about three months pregnant, my boss asked me what we were thinking for names. I said we were thinking Jack, Collin or Kaius. She made a face at the last name and said "whats does that mean??"
I told her I didn't know, because I don't care what a name means, I just care if I like it. I really dont value this person's opinion. This is the same person that decided we were going to play Yankee Swap at Christmas. You know, the game Michael Scott plays on The Office and made Phyllis feel bad for only bringing a homemade oven mitt.

I protested that it would hurt people's feelings, but she said there was no way that would happen. She is the female version of Michael Scott. And I really hope she reads this so she can change her bratty ways! She was horrible! The rules were, you could choose an unwrapped gift from the middle or steal someone elses gift. Well she opened one from the middle and it was an Applebees giftcard. She made a face of disgust and said "Ew. I don't even like Applebees." And then someone else stole it, obviously to make the Applebees giftcard giver feel better. So she picked another gift from the middle. It was Yahtzee Deluxe edition. She again made a face and said "What makes it so deluxe??" And she read the description and just rolled her eyes. What a freakin B.

It was good to get that off my chest.
Tangent over. The meaning of Kaius is "Joyous" or "Happiness"
I think we got that about right.

Debate about the Breastesses

2010-05-31T22:40:00.000-07:00

I was going to name this post "BREASTS" but then I might get a few interesting people googling the word and finding my blog. Not that a million other links wouldnt show up first. Anyway.
A friend of mine linked on Facebook (to all their friends) a blog that contained a recipe for how to make your own cheese...with breastmilk.
There were a lot of comments on the link, like "Ew, Gross" and yada yada yada..
I went to the link and just quickly skimmed through it (har har har)
But then I really got to thinking..Why?

Why is it so gross?

Is it because breastmilk is so sweet? Because they come from boobs, which in our culture are sexual? Is it because you would think it would taste gross?

I talked to both Josh and my sister Jana about it. Both of them said they wouldn't make it/eat it. When I asked why, Josh said human milk is different from cows milk, much like human meat is different from cows meat.
I get it that breastmilk is for the babies, but it is possible for extra breastmilk to accumulate that the baby doesn't need and could possibly go bad. (Did you know you can sell breastmilk on the black market for around $2/oz ??)

Ok back to the cheese. If it tasted good, and I was too poor to buy cheese, I would totally make my own.

Thoughts???
I have to admit when I first saw the post I was like...YUCK. Hmm...but why?
Why do we drink milk from a gross farm animal but not our own species? Especially when you know its disease free?
We are the only species on Earth that doesn't drink our own milk. You know we are all consuming cow's breastmilk right?
If you want to view the recipe, go here.

Blogger Friends...

2010-05-24T01:19:00.000-07:00

Will you please do this, to make it easier for your readers to make comments? it will be WAY less of a hassle for them...

On your dashboard click "settings", then click the "comments" tab. Scroll down to the bottom where it says "Show word verification for comments?" and click NO !!!!

Its pretty dang annoying to type in some annoying made up word before you can read my comment (the captcha).

I've never in my years (all 2 of them) have had a spam comment on my blog.

Yes thank you please!

Now I gotta figure out what in the heck happened to my blinkies. Can you see them or is it a problem with my computer?

disappearing baby

2010-05-17T18:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, I thought that Kaius would develop so gradually that I wouldnt be so surprised by his milestones. But I am absolutely shocked all the time. It is SO weird to see him stand while holding onto something. I am baffled when he manages to get the cheerio in his mouth. My baby is disappearing, and when I see younger babies, Kaius all the sudden looks like a GIANT. Am I the only one who reacts like this?